Salah Struggles
>> Thursday, August 5, 2010
I know that salah is important but lately I just can't get myself to pray, especially fajr. I feel so down. What can I do?
Wish I Could Pray Again,
Salaam Wish I Could Pray Again,
Well first off, well done for knowing that salah is important, you've taken the first step and you WANT to pray, that's important so mashaAllah.
I'm sorry that you feel down at the moment, you know there can be lots of reasons to this. I've been there, the stress of school and grades, teachers who won't get off your back, friends who just don't understand, the backbiters, gossipers, bullies and plain nasty people, even family who won't give you a break and all you want to do is have fun! You can just want to lie in bed all day but you can't let these things dictate whether or not you should pray. The way I see it, darling, is that if I'm down about something, I really shouldn't ignore the One who can actually fix my problems, right? Shouldn't I rush to Him. Wouldn't it make more sense if I'm feeling down to go and talk to Him, ask Him to help me and give me what's best for me?
Let's use our imaginations, hehe, and pretend you had a ginormously huuuuuge problem and the only person who could fix it happened to be the President or leader of your country. Now do you think you'd have easy access to them, to see them directly...? You'd have to break into some official building and do a dozen illegal things like they do in the movies! Now imagine this: all you have to do is make Wudu, face the Qibla, and raise your hands and say 'Allahu Akhbar'. And ALLAH, the LORD who has all Power promises to answer your call. In fact, He doesn't just answer it. He rushes to answer it:
“…And if he comes to Me walking, I [Allah] go to him at speed.”
Can you imagine the Lord of the Lords running to you? Because you have called on Him? Remember, though, He does it in a way that befits His masjesty.
Not only that, but Allah promises that He is at your disposal, that He is right there with you, closer than the veins in your neck, answering your every sentence, question, dua.
Now, see, do you reeeeally know what's happening when you are reciting Surat Al Fatiha:
On the authority of Abu Hurariya, Radiya Allah Anhoo: the Prophet Sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam reported that Allha has said:
…Allah (mighty and sublime be He), had said: I have divided prayer between Myself and My servant into two halves, and My servant shall have what he has asked for.
When the servant says: Al-hamdu lillahi rabbi l-alamin (3), Allah (mighty and sublime be He) says: My servant has praised Me.
And when he says: Ar-rahmani r-rahim (4), Allah (mighty and sublime be He) says: My servant has extolled Me,
and when he says: Maliki yawmi d-din (5), Allah says: My servant has glorified Me - and on one occasion He said: My servant has submitted to My power.
And when he says: Iyyaka na budu wa iyyaka nasta in (6), He says: This is between Me and My servant, and My servant shall have what he has asked for.
And when he says: Ihdina s-sirata l- mustaqim, siratal ladhina an amta alayhim ghayril-maghdubi alayhim wa la d-dallin (7), He says: This is for My servant, and My servant shall have what he has asked for.
It was related by Muslim (also by Malik, at-Tirmidhi, Abu-Dawud, an-Nasa'i and Ibn Majah).
The prayer is not a one person act. It's a partnership that is completed by the Most Loving [Al Wadud] answering your every call.
One reason many of us don't feel like praying is because we don't actually understand who we're praying to. We know prayer is important but we don't understand who Allah is. My advice for you then is read a little about Allah. What does it mean that He's As-Shakur, or The Ever Appreciative? How much more would He appreciate your prayer to Him? Did you see the last question that was asked on this blog? We mentioned the famous hadith about the man who had killed 99 persons, right.
We said that according to one version, Allah commanded the righteous town to draw closer and the evil town to move away, and He said, ’Measure the distance between them,’ and he was found to be closer to (the righteous town) by a hand span, so he was forgiven.
Allah rewarded this man so much just because of one thing. His sincere intention and for the man's desire to turn to Allah. Allah MOVED THE EARTH for him, and granted him Jannah.
THAT's how appreciative He is! Now just imagine if you actually pray to him - 5 times a day?
Allah is also Al Wadud [the Loving] - what does that mean? Do we really understand it? Who wouldn't want to talk to the Loving One? What does it mean that He chose to make one good deed equal to 10 [hasanat] and one bad deed equal to one?
Hun, when it's said that Allah is the Most Merciful, what does really mean? We don't understand that mercy. Because we have been saved from so many things we don't even know ourselves. Think about the most forgiving person you know, who will forgive you for literally everything. Maybe your best friend, maybe your mother. Well multiply that by a million, trillion, gazillion! Think of the MOST merciful. That is Allah. And that is why praying your Salah is so UBER important!
Think about it, taking ten minutes for each prayer max, so that's fifty minutes a day. Let's make it a nice number and round it up to sixty. So one hour out of the twenty-four you have in a day is what Allah has asked you to remember Him with. You might say you're too busy, well I'm sure that hour you might spend on Facebook chatting about the new kid at school can be spent somewhat differently? Or the hour you might spend watching 'Friends' re-runs after school can be used in a way which will actually benefit everything you and your loved ones do.
Your life should revolve around ISLAM, not the other way around. If you find it hard to get home in time from school to pray Dhuhr, then pray at school. Find a quiet spot, ask a friendly teacher to use their classroom during lunch. If you forget the timings, then do what I do; write them on your hand in the morning. It's not preferable and it can rub off, but it gives you an idea during the day of what times you should wait for to pray. Another way which could help you complete your prayers is to simply stay in a state of Wudu. If you break it [whoops!] just make wudu again, straight away. Make Wudu everytime you use the bathroom. That way, when you see that it's time to pray you'll be fresh and squeaky clean to pray.
You say you find it hard to get up for Fajr? Well yeah, me too!
I know the main difficulty is getting up when your mind and body doesn't want to know anything except your bed. Some practical things you can do for “Fighting Fajr Fatigue” is to simply get to bed earlier and before you close your eyes, make a true intention in your heart: 'I'm going to get up for Fajr!' Also, ask Allah to wake you up and pray! Then you can drop off.
Another thing you can do is to set two alarms. One for a minute before you should get up and the other for the normal time. That way, if you're dropping off after you've put your first alarm on snooze (I've done it too!) then the second one will wake you up before you get a chance to shut those tired eyes.
Or, another thing you can do is place your alarm clock or your phone, whatever you use at the other side of your room before you go to sleep the night before. That way, you'll HAVE to get up to turn off the racket. And once you're up - the hard bit is over.
OR, if you've got a friend who's willing to help, who you know is quite successful in getting up for Fajr, ask her to drop you a text, she can be your official 'waker'. You might listen to a friend more than an alarm….
Okay, so you're out of bed; woo, celebrations! You've just got to zombie-walk to the bathroom and the main battle has been won, hurrah!
Once you've splashed water on your face and up your nose etc - you should be pretty much awake. At that point, you should simply concentrate on your prayer. It's a direct connection with your Lord, the Creator, the Sustainer, the One God. When you pray, make sure you know what you're saying. If you don't know Arabic, google the translation and look at it every now and then to remind yourself. If you pray with true sincerity from your heart you'll never regret it, even if you did lose your sleep because of it! When you learn to appreciate your prayers, you'll end them with a smile in your soul.
You may not notice it, but praying 5 times a day purifies us a lot! The simple principle of REMEMBERING ALLAH washes away our sins and only makes Allah pleased.
The Prophet (pbuh) said: 'How clean would a person be who bathes in a river five times a day, so too does the Salah performed five times cleanse someone of their sins?'
The purity you feel from your heart after Salah beats anything else. It's a truly pure type of purity, if you get me?
Your prayers are what will save you from anything in this world - and the next. Grasp this opportunity with both hands sis, 'cause only good will come out of it.
I know you can do this, you're smart enough to know that prayer is important, and you're willing to change. I respect that so much and I pray that Allah will show you the straight path and bring relief to your adversities.
The Prophet (PBUH) said: "The agreement that is between us and them is the prayer..."
...meaning Allah is asking you to pray. After all the millions and gazillions of blessings He has showered you with, He wants you to pray to Him. And only good will come out of it - let's learn off Nike and 'JUST DO IT'!
Take every day as it comes and try your hardest every day to complete your salah for just that day. Don't worry about tomorrow. Do all you can for today. When tomorrow comes, do the same. It will only get easier as you get in the habit.
I believe you can do this. So grab your headscarf and prayermat and wait for the wonders you will receive from PRAYER.
You can do it hun. So smile. :)
Please do check out this extremely extremely amazing link , too: How to Taste Salah!!!
7 wonderful sprinkely thoughts:
I understand how difficult it can be sometimes to get up and pray. I've definitely been in the same situation and still am sometimes. Ever since I began praying regularly, I have moments (when my iman is high) that I love Salah and then the moments come (when Shaitaan is whispering) when I have to drag myself to prayer. I even have those moments, Astaghfurallah, that I get distracted or forget to pray.
Just remember...life is a struggle for something bigger in the end. These ups and downs are all a part of what makes us human. We just have to remind ourselves that this is a struggle against our nafs and shaitaan will do anything to have us listen to our nafs (desires). Stay strong and keep people around you that will help you win the battle, Insha'Allah.
assalamu alaykum i have a question? if you could post an advice for me insha'Allah. since i have started wearing hijab, i noticed that im losing my feminity. i dont think myself attractive anymore. im always wearing frumpy clothes at home, i stopped wearing earrings. i dont know. when i come back home, i just feel lazy to make myself pretty again so i stay like that at home. if you have any advice thanks
What great advice! This is a really good post. Jazakillah kuli khair.
that article was really heart warming..
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Assalam-o-aleykum,
MashAllah this article is truely beautiful! I absolutely LOVED reading it. InshAllah Im hoping to be able to act upon it and please my ALLAH. Ameen.
Jazak Allah for such an amazing piece of advice.
Allah Hafiz
Masha'Allah sis. Jazaka'Allah Khair for the blog! :)
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