Breaking Your Papa and Mama's Trust

>> Saturday, March 9, 2013

I've always been considered the most "obedient" from my sisters...the person my parents could count on...the religious one in the family. But recently I fell into some sins. I won't make excuses for what I did....I have repented but now my major problem is my parents. I feel like a total hypocrite in front of them. I broke their trust...and I'm suffering from extreme guilt. I'm so ashamed....Should I confide in them and admit what I did? They might hate me if I do, though :(

Dear Sister,
First of all, alhamdullilah that you have repented from whatever it is that you did.

Second of all, I know right now you might be thinking that it was just luck that you weren't caught in the act...and that you don't deserve your parents and all of that. 
But actually, hunny, it was not a 'mistake' or 'good luck' that your parents didn't catch you in the act. That was actually planned.
 Think about it.
 Allah could have willed that you would be "found out". But He didn't do that. 
He chose to conceal it for you. 

So, why would you reveal what He has hidden from others?

It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah said: I heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say: “All of my ummah may be forgiven except those who commit sin openly. It is a kind of committing sin openly if a man does something at night, then morning comes and Allaah has concealed his sin, but he says, ‘O So and so, I did such and such last night,’ when his Lord has concealed him (his action) all night but in the morning he reveals that which Allaah had concealed for him.” 

Allah conceals our faults for us. And that's a major blessing. He forgives us. You need to be GRATEFUL that He has hidden your faults and that He's given you another day to come closer to Him.

It was reported from Abu Moosa that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Allaah spreads out His hand at night to accept the repentance of those who committed sins during the day, and He spreads out His hand during the day to accept the repentance of those who committed sins during the night. (He will continue to do this) until the sun rises from the West.” (Narrated by Muslim, 2759).

As for your parents, there really is no need to tell them that you slipped. Just stand up and make it right :D
-  Try to be extra kind to them : offer massages, make them cups of tea, invite them to go out with you to the park, tell them a kind word, etc.
 Make dua for them in the third of the night
- How about memorizing the Qur'an? :) 
“Whoever recites the Quran, learns it and acts according to it, will be given a crown of light to wear on the Day of Judgment whose light will be like the sun. His parents will be clothed in two garments that did not exist in this worldly life. So they will say, ‘What has caused us to be clothed (in these garments)?’ It will be said, ‘Your child taking hold of (memorizing) the Quran has caused this.” {Al-Haakim} 

If that's too hard, just try reading more of it. If they are the ones who taught you how to read, they will inshaAllah be rewarded each time you read =)

- Find out something that you do that bothers them and work on it
Become the person they believe you to be <3 div="" nbsp="">

May Allah make things easier for you 

2 wonderful sprinkely thoughts:

pyari,  March 10, 2013 at 5:45 AM  

Assalamoalikum! I've been recently suggested to bookmark this blog and be its regular reader by someone I fancy and who like you guys & all the good work you've been up to here. i'm loving reading & it, of course, Is my first comment here.
To the sister, who's feeling ashamed confronting her parents after whatever she did, I'd like to say that they simply don't need to be told anything, you know, would hurt them. In addition to what our little aunt said above, you don't need to dwell in past. When Allah has given you this chance to have a lesson why would you simply spoil it by letting it go before your parents or anybody else? Just make sure, you're not going to repeat it ever again to much of your guilt. Hope It helped. :)

Anonymous,  March 14, 2013 at 4:13 AM  

Whenever Shaytan reminds you of your past, remind him of his future.


Just let it go.

Forgive yourself.



Listen to soothing sounds. Lie in bed and watch the sunlight through the window. Reclaim your innocence.

Remember, virginity is just a human concept invented by men--the only Islamic concept is of haya and purity. By this I don't mean that premartial sex is allowed. I just mean that any act, which may be considered to "darken the character", does not lower your status as an individual. We are all beloved humans in Allah's Eyes.

May Allah bless us all.

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Asalamu aialkum!
Well, what do you think? You know, you're part of the team, as well. Please help a sister out and share your own advice/experiences/etc. One for all and all for one =)
P.S. I reserve the right to remove any disrespectful comment ;)

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