Muslimahs just wanna have fun!?

>> Wednesday, November 20, 2013

I want to be a better Muslim, but I have this fear that if I were to commit, I would no longer be the fun person I am. Would submiting to Allah not take away my freedom,would i stil be happy and do fun things or would I have to be all 'religious' all the time?

 “Allah did not send me to be harsh or cause harm, but He sent me to teach [people] and make things easy [for them].” (Saheeh Muslim: 1478)

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatulahi wa barakatu!!!!
 My dearest sissy! Masha'Allah how wonderful to receive a question like yours which I could totally relate to! I actually was struggling with this EXACT same challenge not long ago, so when I saw your question, I thought I had to definitely reach out to you right away bidhniAllah!

First things first, Alhamdulillah that you have intentions to want to strive to be a better Muslimah. This is a very wonderful goal and I think we should all be striving to achieve this! We must always strive to be the best Muslimah in the sight of Allah Subhanahu wa ta'ala and we must always strive to follow the correct Qur'an and Sunnah as best as we can and aiming to have the mother of believers (May Allah be pleased with them all) as are role models!

Secondly, pleasing Allah, The Almighty, is something that will result in true happiness. The real bliss comes from remembering Allah and doing things that will please Him, and Him alone.

That said, I really want to let you know about my personal experience my dear sissy, and maybe you can even relate to how I once felt  !  When I first converted to Islam, I was so excited and had so much zeal with learning the religion. I practically ate, breathed, sleep-ed (is that a word!) Islam ( I mean even though we should be incorporating Islam with everything because it is a lifestyle and not just a 'cultural practice" contrary to what many believe!) I was so absorbed into the religion and I rushed to study and learn as much as I could and I even set unrealistic goals for myself!  In the end, I burnt myself out and I became even more overwhelmed and stressed. I started feeling lazy and exhausted and I neglected the most important part of being a Muslim, and that is BEING CONSISTENT AND MODERATE with every aspect of worship! 

That is why he also noted, “Take upon yourself only those actions for which you have the strength to carry out consistently.” (Saheeh Al-Bukhaaree: 1100)
I was so strict upon myself to keep seeking knowledge and I made it a top priority because I thought that Allah loves those who surround themselves in seeking knowledge only! I would leave all my hobbies and dedicate all my time to reading and learning and then I started asking myself why I was feeling so stressed and I even became depressed at one point (astughfurAllah!) but then a dear sister of mine gave me the most valuable advice I could ever receive and it has helped me soooooooo much with all of my affairs!!!! She told me that Islam is a religion of moderation and balance and that I should not overburden myself with all this learning to the point that I lose myself and forget about who I am as a person! Yes, Alhamdulillah I am a Muslimah first and foremost, but I am by no means even close to being a student of knowledge. I thought that the only way to get close to Allah was through seeking knowledge 24-7 and being so strict and "boring" ! Alhamdulillah Allah guided me to the straight path and gave me the tawfeeq to realize that Islam is a lifestyle and it is not something that should feel like a burden or change you into some strict, boring person! Islam teaches us to excel in the things that we are good at and it helps to perfect our personalities and character to that of our beloved prophet (peace be upon him).

Islam doesn't dismiss desires, it just disciplines them.

So as you can see my dear sissy, you are free to pursue your hobbies and be yourself (as long as it does not mean jeopardizing your religion or doing haram things) and you are free to be the sweet sister I am sure that you are! As long as we know that we are not doing something that displeases Allah (i.e- being immodest, cursing, slandering, engaging in TOO much idle talk, listening to music, and doing the things not permissible for us) then we can even do it with the intentions of worship and be rewarded for it!!!!! For example, we can listen to the Qur'an while doing some embroidery, sewing, or any crafts you are interested in and you can use that finished product and donate it as sadaqah and at the same time memorize the Qur'an all at once! I know that for some, sitting at a desk and memorizing the Qur'an can pose as a challenging and frustrating task, even though we are doing it for the sake of Allah, we can still find ways that are better suited to our learning style! Playing the surah over and over while you are unconsciously focusing on a task such as embroidery, crocheting, or even knitting can really really help you absorb and learn the Qur'an that much easier!  There are so many things that you can do that is productive and all the while counts as worship to Allah, the Almighty! The opportunities are endless but you just have to get a little "creative" and make sure you don't do anything haram or outside of Islam! Be yourself and have fun! Enjoy the life of a Muslimah ! It is so rewarding!

Islam is made to be easy and Allah does not burden a soul beyond that it can bear…” (Qur'an, 2:286) Though it is important to live our lives as Muslims in this dunya, we must remember that we are ultimately striving for Jannah and all our actions and goals should be to earn the pleasure of Allah and a home in Jannah Insha'Allah!!!

Remember, everything in moderation! 

Anas reported that some of the Companions of Allaah's Messenger (SAW) used to say: "I will not marry women"; someone else said: "I will not eat meat"; and someone else said: "I will not lie down in bed". (On hearing this): The Prophet (SAW) praised Allaah, and glorified Him and said: "what has happened to these people that they say so and so, whereas I observe prayer and I sleep too. I observe fast and I break my fast; I marry women also. And he who turns away from my Sunnah (i.e., my example or lifestyle), he has no relation with me" [Narrated in Saheeh Muslim vol. 2. p703. no. 32361].

“Beware of extremism in religion, for the only thing that destroyed those before you was extremism in religion.” (Sunan Ibn Maajah: 3029)

Don't wear yourself out with excessive worship to the point that you will leave it completely (audhubillah), and find things that you love to do and do them with the intentions for earning the Pleasure of Allah, the Almighty! Observe proper hijab (clothing as well as attitude) in public and in private (with your friends and family) you can be the fun person you truly are as long as you know and always remember that Allah is All-Seeing, All-Hearing, and All-Knowing, then you will not overstep your boundaries and behave inappropriately! Being a Muslimah is a fun and easy job! We just need to know how to do it! Starting a crafts club, a halaqah pot-luck, or even a small workout group for your friends at home are just some fun and exciting ideas that you can pursue! Focus on your favorite hobbies and excel in them all while remembering to include Allah in your intentions! I guarantee you will not feel stressed or that Islam is "too strict" and you will even find yourself being happier then ever and and the best thing is that your emaan increases and so does your knowledge! May Allah grant you success !

May Allah forgive me for anything that I've said that has offended you, anything good I've said is from Allah and anything bad is from my own self and I seek refuge in Allah from shaitan the accursed. Ameen! 

Please also see this older post called "Is everything Haram":

8 wonderful sprinkely thoughts:

Anonymous,  November 20, 2013 at 12:11 PM  

This is a really good question. What would you advise a person who gave up tv, comics (manga usually contains immodesty in pictures and also it is about haraam relations mostly-bf gf and so on not to mention some themes in manga being out right against aqaa'id eg.fruits basket has stuff about humans transforming and zodiac etc),watching futile youtube videos for I don't really know what to do when I'm 'relaxing' usually just browse ordinary blogs!you should note that there's ALWAYS work to be doneso I just feel like I should do that...your loving sisx

Anonymous,  November 20, 2013 at 1:10 PM  

assalamualaikum wa rahmatulahi wa barkaatu dear anon ( hee hee don't forget your Salaams ! Easy reward! Yayy!)

yes, that is a great great great question. and I have an answer for you bidhni'Allah!
you see, I am actually a convert to Islam, so I actually used to lead a very very haram lifestyle...movies, parties, blah blah blah so on and so forth! and once I converted to Islam Alhamdulillah i was able to leave all that haram behind! because as Muslims "we hear and obey" ! Of course it wasn't easy and stuff but you know it takes practice and a lot of duaa to Allah the Almighty! Remember that famous hadith (
[1] Reported by Ahmad [5/363], al-Marwazi in "Zawaid az-Zuhd" [no. 412], an-Nasa'i in "al-Kubra" as mentioned in "Tuhfah al-Ashra" [11/199] from one of the Companions that the Messenger of Allah (SAW) said, "indeed you will not leave anything for the sake of Allah except that Allah will replace it with something better than it." The isnad is saheeh.) Well surely Allah's Promise is very true !!! If you have the right intentions to leave the bad things for the sake of Allah, He will replace you with sooooooo much KHEYR you can't even imagine ALLAHU AKBAR!!! Like the posts explains, try to find something you like and focus on that in a halal way! for example, you can always draw educational Islamic cartoons for kids (without all the human faces etc!) and you can replace the youtube videos with educational videos on learning more about the religion (I love particularly watching videos about the Last Day and the Sound of the Trumpet- these are always great reminders that ground you!) you can even take a break and go for walks with your family and see all the beautiful creations of Allah around you! maybe you can even take up photography an take pictures of the beautiful scenery!? there is so much to do and so little time sis!! Maybe you can even start a blog yourself!!! Allahu Akbar.. Allah will always give you a way out so long as you are aiming to please Him and NOT the creation or your desires!!!!! give it a try insha'Allah! may Allah grant you tawfeeq ameen!

Anonymous,  November 22, 2013 at 1:34 PM  

Wa-salaam,oh dear I forgot basic greeting...jzk for the lovely reply^^

Aziza November 24, 2013 at 7:46 PM  

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatu!

Beautiful post my dear, I truly enjoyed reading it. I'm always checking the "One Chinese Muslimah" blog for updates to increase my are truly a role model for me dear sis and may Allah bless you always! (: <3

khadijah November 27, 2013 at 10:20 AM  

walaikumassalam wa rahmatulahi wa barakatuuuuu sis Azizaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
O Allāh, make me better than what they think of me, and forgive me for what they do not know about me, and do not take me to account for what they say about me. ameen!!!!
jazakillah kheyr for your kind thoughts sissy!! i hope that we all benefit from each other and may we all meet in Jannah!! ameeeeen!!!
one chinese muslimah!

Sarah,  November 29, 2013 at 2:06 PM  

Assalamu alaikum,
This is a good question. I think worship and studying our deen should be our priorities, which will lead to happiness and fulfillment in sha Allah. As long as the happiness you are feeling is as a consequence of pleasing Allah subhanahu wa ta'alaa then there is nothing wrong in it. But if it is from materialistic or dunya reasons then it is wrong and you are risking His punishment.

Zooney Looney March 4, 2014 at 8:32 AM  

Some people mention "movies" with the haram. Why?

Little Auntie March 8, 2014 at 3:00 AM  

We've got a post that might help you with that, one, Zooney :)

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Asalamu aialkum!
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