>> Friday, July 2, 2010
Is everything haraam?? Is there anything that we can do?
Dear A non mouse!
My amigo, I so know what you mean. There are some grown-ups out there (okay, fine, people my age, even) who can really make you feel like everything is the ‘h’ word…H.A.R.A.A.M.
But the truth couldn’t be any further! Well actually, it could, if we change the ‘h’ word into the other ‘h’ word- H.A. L.A. A. L. One of the fundamental rules of fiqh, actually, is that….
*Get READY FOR ThiS*
‘Everything’ (outside of worship) is halal except when there’s proof that it’s haram (e.g. textual proof in the Qur’an, sunnah, or what can be derived by analogy as proof).
Does that mean you can go and do anything you want to do? Err. Nope. This rule isn’t a license to do whatever you want- it just lets you realize that Allah intends for you ease. Most things are halal. The exceptions are the haram things, not the other way around.
Let’s do a little fun exercise. Let’s list something that is haraam and some things in the same category that aren’t haraam. Does that sound fair to you?
Alcohol (wine, beer, etc.)
- Juices (Apple juice, Orange juice, Cranberry juice, Mango juice, Carrots and Orange juice- just checkin’ if you’re still reading this and btw, this really is a juice!)
- Milkshakes (strawberry milkshake, chocolate milkshake, etc.)
- Coffee (Cappuccino, espresso, mocha, etc.)
- Sparkling water
- Mountain Dew,
- 7 Up,
- The list goes on!
You see how long the halaal list is compared to the haraam list?
It’s like when Allah Subhanoo Wa’ Tala told Adam and Hawa that they could eat from wherever they wanted, except from that one tree…We have pretty much the same thing. We can do most/many things, except some small things…
And even then, sometimes we can do those things, themselves, just ‘in a specific context’. Huh, you say? Haha, I say! Yes, some things that are ‘haram’ are actually not ‘haram’ in themselves…for example, ‘wearing make-up’ is not haram if it’s done in an area where only girls/mahrams are (like home, etc.), sex’ is not haraaameitherbutpleasecontinuereadinganddon’tstoprightthereoryou’re going to get me in big trouble with the big aunties for writing this, LOL.
But really, it isn’t haraam, so long as it’s within ‘the marriage context’.
In fact, Islamically, we believe that within that context, it can actually yield you a reward or ajr!
The fact that you get a reward for it obviously demonstrates then, it’s not ‘sex’ itself which is haram. It’s sex outside of marriage that is haram, whether we’re talking about pre-marital sex or adultery.
The truth is, when we look at this example that sex is haram when it’s outside of marriage but rewarded when it’s inside the marriage, we realize something clearly. Allah has forbidden for us or made haram for us that which is (I’m using this word on purpose, haha) harmful for us. By forbidding it outside of marriage, He has protected us from catching diseases, having illegitimate children with no right to inheritance, no clue who their father is, broken families, etc.
We can understand this even more when we consider this ayah:
"O you who believe! Give your response to God and His Messenger, when He calls you to that which will give you life." [A-Anfal 24]The things that He has told us to do and the things He has told us not to do are for our own benefit. They are what ‘give us life’.
Now, I know that right now you’re a teen and that you were asking about being able to ‘do’ things….
The truth is, there are plenty of things that you can do!
We’ve got to be creative and think of alternatives.
Let’s say the people around us ‘go out to clubs and drink a few drinks’. We obviously don’t do that! But we can meet up with friends in coffee cafes. What’s the harm in that?
What about going on picnics with friends?
Going to the beach might be a bit hard- what with all the nakey people- but how about going to an all girl’s gym (if you’re a girl, obviously :P). Playing basketball with your friends/soccer?
If a friend of yours has an in-door pool (okay, we can dream :D), what’s the problem with swimming?
What about reading? Not all books revolve around ‘bad or forbidden things’!
What about inviting some friends over and cooking together? It can be a lot of fun- choose a recipe, go out and buy the groceries together, come home and cook! (Gee, first I talk about drinks and now I talk about food. I sound obsessed with ‘eating’, n this post. It might just be cause I am, lol).
We don’t get tattoos but we have henna. We don’t listen to music but we listen to ‘islamic nasheeds’. Again, alternatives, alternatives, alternatives.
The fact is, don’t limit yourself to the things your ‘friends’ do. Think outside of the box. And if your "friends" are going out to do some haram things, have a back up plan ready. Get to know some Muslim girls from the Masjid. You don’t need to hang out with only people from your school.
I will say though that sometimes, it is going to be hard. And this world is going to seem like a….
That’s cause that’s what it is for believers.
Prophet Muhammad (Sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam) said, ‘The world is a prison for the believer and a paradise for the disbeliever.” [Sahih Muslim Kitaab Az-Zuhd]Our paradise awaits for us…
Stay strong! You can do it!
I believe in you,