The Wedding Day

>> Thursday, September 12, 2013

Since you just had a wedding party (mashallah), any tips on how to have a fun-filled yet appropriate wedding and how to avoid the pitfalls when planning the wedding? That would be great. Much love <3>

Asalamu aliakaum!

Before I start, I just want to say that ...of course, I had a segregated wedding ;)

Anyways, here are some ideas I did/had and y'all are free to share more!

a) I passed around a guest book during the party. My twist: I put up jokes, riddles, facts about me and my husband (like how we both hate cheese, how it was my boss at work who told me about him, etc.), islamic quotes, all throughout the guest book so that while people were writing in it, they were being entertained..

You could also have a slideshow ^ with funny pictures of you and the guests...or even baby pictures.

b) I had a pinata (can be a simple big big colorful balloon) for the children....It doesn't have to be only for the children, though. Who doesn't like chocolate and goodies?

c) You can have someone be like the 'host/coordinator' of the party and play with the colors that people are wearing. Here are some examples:
Whoever is wearing red: has to sing a song in the microphone
whoever is wearing blue tell us about a funny time with the bride/ groom
whoever is wearing yellow: say a dua for the bride and groom
whoever is wearing pink: tell us their favorite hadith
whoever is wearing purple: tell us their recipe for ___________- something the groom likes)
whoever is wearing black: give us the 'most important advice' for the bride and groom
whoever is wearing golden: draw a picture for the bride and groom
whoever is wearing silver: tell us about something that scares them
embarassing moments/ their first time meeting the bride/groom/ what they wish someone had told them before getting married/ etc.

^You can do that with numbers too. Just put number underneath each chair and call out: whoever is sitting on number 8, do .....Or even with "balloons". Hand out a balloon to each person and whoever has....

d) Pass the parcel game! If you're not familiar with it, this article explains it very well: Remember though to be using Islamic nasheeds 

e) Ice cream sundaes anyone? Fun and yummy :P

f) Leave 'puzzles' or even riddles on tables for guests sitting together to work together on and have something to talk about....

g) You could have a theme too like "flowers" (and all guests have to wear something with a flower)

How to avoid the pitfalls?

1. Recognize that your marriage is an act of worship and therefore, one should start it (the wedding) in a way that reflects that. What I mean by that is that the wedding ultimately should be a means to seeking Allah's pleasure and not be at all a license for you to sin. 

2. Discuss with the husband/ fiance how you're going to make sure that your wedding is "halal". Discuss food, music, seating arrangements (segregated!), etc. Both of you HAVE TO AGREE aboutt it and be ready to face the "criticism" you might be getting together...

3. Inform your relatives right from the beginning (like even a month before the wedding or however long you are planning it) that you're trying to make your wedding a way to please Allah...You would love their help, suggestions and cooperation in this...and of course, you want them there. (Once you've told them that Allah's pleasure is your target, you are less likely to have them expecting "wrong cultural practices". IF they do start giving you suggestions, just say, me and my fiance have agreed though that we want.....)

4. Stick to a budget. Remember, there's no reason to start your marriage with a debt!

5. Your wedding is your day. Not your neighbor's or cousin or whoever. So don't compare it to anyone else.

6. Have what the guests will listen to prepared in advance and who will play it. I know that sounds so simple, but mistakes happen all the time in that area ....

Well, sisters, what else can you add? :) 

3 wonderful sprinkely thoughts:

seekingpatience,  September 15, 2013 at 3:01 PM  

Loved this! Mashallah. These are great ideas. I've played the parcel game before. It was so fun. Except the gift in the center was NOT valuable on purpose :)And there was nothing in some of the layers. So it was unpredictable.

How about dressing up? I know people take lots of pictures at parties and we might end up in the background. So is it better to wear hijab or not even though it's segregated? :)

Little Auntie September 17, 2013 at 5:21 AM  

Man...the dressing up question is tricky! In some ways, it is a 'risk/ gamble'.
I think subhanAllah, those who fear Allah and choose not to take off their hijab will definitely be rewarded for their extra "taqwa" (God consciousness)...
And those who want to take it off and make sure as much as possible to avoid being in any pictures "...Allah will also know their intentions.

One thing a person can do after such a party though is send a message to all who attended the party to please double check that they are not in any of the pictures :)

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Asalamu aialkum!
Well, what do you think? You know, you're part of the team, as well. Please help a sister out and share your own advice/experiences/etc. One for all and all for one =)
P.S. I reserve the right to remove any disrespectful comment ;)

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