A Small Note to the Ones who said NO.

>> Friday, October 14, 2011

On behalf of my sisters out there...I present a small note to "X-Suitor and His Mother".

Dear X-Suitor and His Mother,

So you might think that this is a last desperate attempt to get you back. It isn't. It's a sincere thank you note.

When you "turned me down" because of the color my skin, you revealed your own true colors. You did me a favor I can't even begin to thank you for. Color? Are you serious?!

When you turned me down because of how "big" I was- yeah, I'm a real lady and real women don't come in size 0- you showed just how small and narrow minded you really were.

You "turning me down" was the best thing that could have happened to me.

But, for your sake, I thought I'd help you out a little.

I thought I'd warn you- because when you were examining me like a piece of merchandise- you were examining the perfect handiwork of Allah. You were finding fault with what Allah had fashioned.

And "Auntie"...next time you enter someone's house, just think of your own daughter. Some day, somebody's going to enter her house...How would you like them to treat her?

Ever Grateful.


Readers- what would you like to tell any x-suitors and their mothers? What lessons can we learn from those experiences?

4 wonderful sprinkely thoughts:

Um Zakarya October 14, 2011 at 10:47 AM  

Assalamu Aleykum,

SubhanALLAH I know what you're talking about so well.I just got divorced because I wasn't from the same cultural background as my ex husband and his mother insisted in him divorcing me.I would tell them that they should think I'm also someone's daughter and sister, and some day this might indeed happen to ex's sister or daughter, and that day ex and his mother will know how it feels.
We should stick to our Deen and not Jahil cultures, subhanALLAH jahil muslims really do a lot of harm to our Ummah.

Anonymous,  October 14, 2011 at 11:52 PM  

Assalamu alaikum,

My dear Ever Grateful, mashaAllah, you are strong willed! I had something similar happen to me..it got complicated and I suppose that I didn't meet their idea of beauty. I was really hurt and it took some time to heal. But you know, this experience made me grow. Alhamdulillah Allah helped me. May Allah grant you a husband that will love you for the sake of Allah and treat you like you are his queen <3 Insha'Allah keep your head up and make dua, it really does help.

Um Zakarya, I'm so sorry to hear that. May Allah grant you good in this life and in the next.

Little Auntie October 15, 2011 at 6:54 AM  

Dearest Umm Zakarya, I'm so sorry to hear that. I felt my blood boil actually when I read that...and my heart break. I pray that Allah rewards your patience with someone and something much better- someone who can appreciate the TREASURE that is you. You are so right that these jahil customs are breaking down our Ummah...

And I think that's the biggest lesson I learn from it. How much we have to go back to our deen and the Prophet and companion's example. Our priorities have gotten seriously messed up, haven't they?

Anonymous, I'm sorry to hear that you also had a similar experience and that you didn't 'meet their definition of beauty'. From your comment though, you seem like a very beautiful person. May Allah bless you with the same.

Anonymous,  October 17, 2011 at 7:32 AM  

Well I never really got around to the ta'aruf stage because the mother blew up when I requested to have a third person present in our conversation -.- but khayr insha'Allah, I always believe that He knows best for us anyway. And that the right person is waiting out there for us. For now, Allah is teaching you lessons before you meet the right one!

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Asalamu aialkum!
Well, what do you think? You know, you're part of the team, as well. Please help a sister out and share your own advice/experiences/etc. One for all and all for one =)
P.S. I reserve the right to remove any disrespectful comment ;)

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