Taking a Stand

Assalamualaikum sisters,
May Allah reward you for making an effort to help your Muslim sisters.
I've just encountered your blog and have been liking it since then!!:)
I think it is time for me to seek help and maybe get a different perspective on the issues that I face in life.
I live in a non muslim majority country. I see so many people around me who proud of being a freethinker, atheist etc..
I really wanna help them to understand Islam but the problem is, I don't have the confidence to speak up in the lecture..I would just sit and listen to the lecture and even if a person misquote the qur'an or say bad stuff on Islam, I just sat there quitely, although I know that what they are saying is wrong!
and everytime it happens, I can't stop but to blame myself and hating myself for being such a coward..:(
My situation is I'm guessing not as complex as others but somehow I find myself crying and feeling angry with myself. It doesn't happen all the time but whenever I've done such a mistake, I kept blaming myself over it!I know that a Muslim should accept that everything comes from Allah but I just can't help it!
It's so frustrating because I'm an introvert person and I prefer to be an observer and a listener..it's just in my nature..
Is it wrong for me to be like this? Am I sinning for not defending the religion.? but I'm just an average Muslim girl, I dont have that much knowledge of Islam and I get nervous speaking in front of a crowd..
but I know that something's not right here..
so please, help me!!
love,
muslima

Dearest Muslima,
wa'alaykum as salam wa rahmatullah wa barkatoo! :D

Awww, sister, I know what you’re talking about. If you’re like me, you’re actually a very shy person who hates confrontations. It can be hard speaking up. I love how you said though in the end “But I know that something’s not right here”…

Let’s work with that, okay. Let’s think about it this way….

How would you feel if you were standing in a corner of a room, hidden from view, and you overheard two teens talking about you? Going on and on about you- all of it just hateful lies… Just when you decide enough is enough, one of your good friend walks in. You’ve known her forever and you two have been through it all together. You’ve also helped her a lot. You think to yourself that here’s someone who will straighten everything out when you notice that she just walks right out of there without saying a word.

Who would you most be hurt by?

You see, the truth is that while Allah subhanoo Wa’ Tala is beyond compare, He did make it very clear that we have to speak up when someone says something concerning Him that is wrong.

On the authority of Abu Sa'id (may Allah be pleased with him), who said that the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said:

Let not any one of you belittle himself. They said: O Messenger of Allah, how can any one of us belittle himself? He said: He finds a matter concerning Allah about which he should say something, and he does not say [it], so Allah (mighty and sublime be He) says to him on the Day of Resurrection: What prevented you from saying something about such-and-such and such-and-such? He say: [It was] out of fear of people. Then He says: Rather it is I whom you should more properly fear.

It was related by Ibn Majah with a sound chain of authorities.

So the next time you hear someone saying hateful things about Allah/ Islam/ religion, I want you to stop a second and remind yourself: Allah sees me right now. And eventually, I’m going to stand in front of Him, alone, and He’s going to ask me about this. He’s going to ask me about what I did, what I said, and what I didn’t do, or didn’t say.

The reality is that Allah chose for you to be right there at that moment for a reason. It wasn’t just coincidence that you happened to be there.

It could be a test of your imaan, to see whether or not you truly care about what He thinks.

Or it could be because it’s a dawah opportunity.

Let’s admit it. It’s a little awkward to just suddenly say “Hi, I’m Muslim. Want to know more about Islam?” But if you happen to be there and someone has decided to start talking about religion/ Allah/ this is the perfect opportunity for you to do the best job out there-

And who is better in speech than one who invites to Allah and does righteousness and says, "Indeed, I am of the Muslims." (33) And not equal are the good deed and the bad. Repel [evil] by that [deed] which is better; and thereupon the one whom between you and him is enmity [will become] as though he was a devoted friend. (34) (Surat Fussailet)

All you have to do is to say, ““Excuse me, I believe that this was taken out of context.”…or…"You know, while the media likes to spin around the idea that blah blah blah, the reality is really different. If you don’t mind, I’d like to quote what the Qur’an really says.”

And you know what? Take out a translation of the Quran (with certain verses already highlighted/bookmarked) and really show it to them. Hold it up. (Always keep a small one in your bag :P)

Most people who are respectful will either: respectfully disagree, apologize, or maybe even start a real discussion with you.

That’s all it takes. No matter how small/ tiny you feel, you can make a difference. You really can! Always remember, you’re ‘the expert’ here. You’re the one who knows what Islam really says. (If they bring up an issue that you’re not to certain about, tell them, “I need to look more into that, but I hope to get back to you on that...)

If you do happen to be talking to someone particularly nasty, at least you would know that you stood up for what you believe. At least you can go home without feeling 'guilty' or 'blaming yourself".

In fact, I just read this fantastic quote the other day:

“I think the reward for conformity is that everyone likes you except yourself.”
— Rita Mae Brown

And the truth is that even the nastiest person might be affected years later by that one word you said. Remember, Omar (Radi Allah anahoo) ended up going from wanting to kill the Prophet (literally) to being the second Caliphate.

So no matter what..It's a win- win situation :) You go home, happy with yourself, and you also plant a seed which might just grow <3

And you know what else helps? Remember that what you’re doing is following in the footsteps of the Prophets. Prophet Mohammed (sallah Allah alayhee wa salaam) had to stand up to an entire nation. All of the prophets had to stand up and to call their people to the true worship to God.

I know what you’re thinking. But, but, “I’m not a prophet”.

You don’t have to be to a prophet to defend Islam. You don’t have to be a scholar. You just have to care.


Let’s look at the Quran.

In surat Yaseen, we see that Allah Subhanoo Wa’ Tala sent three Prophets to one village. Three! But that village kept refusing to admit the truth. And so, despite the fact that 3 prophets had already been sent, one individual decided to also stand up to the truth and carry that message to his people. He felt the importance of the message of Islam and he wanted everyone to know the truth…

A man came from the other side of the village to show his support to the message. Allah says, “Then there came running, from the farthest part of the City, a man, saying, ‘O my people! Obey the apostles. Obey those who ask no reward of you (for themselves), and who have themselves received Guidance’.” (36:20,21).

This man wasn’t a prophet. Just a simple person, just like you and me.…He was just one man but he earned his place in the Quran. He earned the right to be known forever…because he took that stand.

And besides that man, I’m sure you know the stories of the Sahaba, including Bilal (Radi Allah anahoo) who went through so much. Alhamdulilla, we don’t have to go through such trials, but if we want to join these people in jannah, we also need to take a stand.

The thing that you have to remember is that Shaytaan wants you scared. He wants you to convince yourself that it’s okay if you don’t speak up, that but you know what it? What if no one spoke up? What if no one ever decided to take a stand?

I know you said that as a Muslim you should accept that everything happens for a reason, but while that is true, we still have our part to do. Allah actually promises in the Quran not to change the condition of a people until they change themselves….

Indeed, Allah will not change the condition of a people until they change what is in themselves. (13:11)

And the Quran also teaches us that one person can be equal to an entire nation….

Indeed, Abraham was (equal to) a nation, obedient to Allah, of pure faith and was not among the idolaters, (120) (Surat Al Nahl)

Just imagine…What kind of a reward you would get, if you were that person…that person who stood up and defended Allah and His chosen religion :) You just have no idea how Allah will reward you for speaking up the truth at that moment.

So, sister, smile and stand up. Speak up, even if your voice trembles. You can make things easier for yourself though by bringing a friend with you (if you have to attend the lecture) and reading more about these issues :D The more knowledgeable you are, the more confident you’ll sound and easier it will be.) I promise.

And remember… You have Allah on your side.

And strive for Allah with the striving due to Him. He has chosen you and has not placed upon you in the religion any difficulty. [It is] the religion of your father, Abraham. Allah named you "Muslims" before [in former scriptures] and in this [revelation] that the Messenger may be a witness over you and you may be witnesses over the people. So establish prayer and give zakah and hold fast to Allah. He is your protector; and excellent is the protector, and excellent is the helper. (78)(Surat Al Hajj)

P.S.