Meet the Final Prophet.

>> Friday, June 24, 2011

hey i muslim girl
i just wanted to share this one thing
when i told my mom she told my dad
and now i have a black eye and a broken arm
umm i am a muslim girl
but i Don't like Mohammad // im sorry i just dont like his teaching
i dnt like how he married a 9 year old and how he beat his wife/wives.. i don't like how sexist he was.. i hate how he made islam about him and not Allah
I am really sowi but thats just how i feel.. i am so sorry

but umm can I be a muslim and not relate to muhammad but love Allah ?
i sowi but even after being hurt i dnt "like" him

Dear Sister,

Before I answer your concerns, let me ask you a question :) Or actually many questions :D

What if I told you about a man who even though he was super busy and even though he came from an extremely macho society (we’re talking about a society where people thought women were things that you owned or buried alive) would actually help his wife in the house and even stitch/mend his own clothes? What if I told you that this man would watch his wife drink so that he could place his lips on the exact same place when it was his turn? Not only that but this man would listen to his wife- truly listen when she would talk, would joke with her, even race her. He never hit his wife and he openly declared his love for her in front of everyone?

But this man wasn’t just a wonderful husband. What if I told you that he was a loving father and grandfather…he used to always stand up and kiss his daughter when she’d enter the room? He would carry his granddaughter and even hold her while he was praying. And he’d love to let his grandchildren sit on his back while he’d carry them. He used to ‘play’ with the other kids, too, playfully splashing them with water.

This man’s compassion wasn’t limited to his family and children, though. He cared about everyone. Like the fact that he never once asked his servant for ten years why he had done something or why he hadn’t done something. Ten years. 3,600 days or so…

And you know the saying to give someone the shirt off your back? This man was like that. Even though he didn’t have that much clothes at all, he was extremely generous. He was always giving away his things in charity. In fact, one day, he came out dressed in a new ‘shawl’. A friend of his saw him wearing it and actually told him to give it to him. So this man went back to his house, took it off, and gave it to him. Just like that.

What else?

What if I told you that this man was also the “leader”/ “president” of the country and, yet, he never acted like some ‘mighty king’? You know how today they whenever a King/royalty/ president comes into a room, people stand up for them? Well, he never liked that. He didn’t want people to stand up for him or treat him differently. Instead, he would sit with servants and the poor. He would help the orphans and widows. He knew the ‘poor people’ of his followers…actually knew them and cared about each one!

When his people were digging a trench for a battle that was taking place, this man didn’t just stand there, watching them do all the work. He got down and dug and dug- until his chest was covered with dirt.

How many presidents are like that today? Can you name me a single one that would do that? Work alongside his people in the dirt….?

What if I told you that this man used to keep all the valuables of his people? They trusted him- just like how we put things in a bank, they put their stuff in his house. Yet, the people got angry with him just because he told them to worship God. So they decided to kill him. This man had to leave his city in the middle of the night, and yet, even though he knew that his people were plotting to kill him, he made sure that there were arrangements in place for the people to get back their valuables and things. He didn’t think “Haha, I got all their stuff. I’m outta here. They deserve it since they want to kill me!” He didn’t think that, at all.

Yes, this man cared about everyone, animals included. Once, on a journey, somebody picked up some bird's two little chickies. The mother bird was 'devastated' and she kept circling the air, beating its wings in grief. This man noticed the mother bird's grief and wanted to know who had separated the bird from its offspring? Yes, this man cared about the feelings of a bird :)

Children, animals, poor, orphans, needy....

I’m not talking about some superstar. Or some hero from a movie. I’m talking about Prophet Mohammed.

I know that you said that when you asked your parents about him, they ‘hit you’. You know what?

Prophet Mohammed was way more patient than your parents and much more understanding. Imagine asking your dad permission to go have sex with someone. What would your mother do? What about your father?

Well, you know what the Prophet sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam did? While everyone else was ‘rebuking’ the young man who asked for permission to do zina, the Prophet sallah allahoo alyhaee wa salam calmly sat him down and talked to him about it- he asked him some questions so that the young man concluded that sex out of marriage was not appropriate. But not only did the Prophet talk to him ever so calmly and gently, the Prophet sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam put his hand on his chest and made sincere dua for him. How many teachers or Imams do that today? Would our own parents do that? Make dua for us? Or would they slap us silly if we were to ask them such a question?

What if your parents saw you checking out a handsome man or saw your brother checking out a beautiful woman in Mecca- of all places- during Hajj (of all times)? The prophet didn’t scream at him “It’s HaJJ. LOWER your gaze”. He didn’t ‘freak out’. He just gently turned the Companion’s face away.

And the thing is, what you said about Prophet Mohammed being sexist? And beating his wives? That's completely not true. I have to ask where have you been doing your research? And he NEVER made Islam all about himself? That's completely NOT true.
He said, "Don't commend me as Christians commend Jesus the son of Marry. But say about me, the servant and the messenger of Allah." (Muslim)
The companions of Prophet Muhammad used to stay sitting when he come because they know how he feels bad when they stand for him. (Tirmidhi)
Once a newcomer to his gathering was filled with awe and anxiety. When he detected this, the Prophet said to the person, 'Please relax and be at ease! I am not a great monarch. I am only a son of a lady who ate cured meat.' (Ibn Majah)
You have to realize something. It was Allah subhanoo Wa' Tala who chose prophet Mohammed to be a prophet. Don't you think Allah is the Wisest and Knows who should be a prophet? If you truly love Allah, then you should accept His decision that Prophet Mohammed be the last Prophet.

 In fact, we love the Prophet because Allah subhanoo Wa’ Tala told us to!
"The Prophet is preferable for the believers even to their own selves..." (33:6)
Say: If your fathers, your sons, your brothers, your wives, your kindred, the wealth that you have gained, the commerce in which you fear a decline, and the dwelling in which you delight are dearer to you than Allah and His Messenger (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam) and striving hard and fighting in His cause, then wait until Allah brings about His Decision (torment). [(9): 24]

This was Allah’s Command. 

"You have indeed a good example in the Messenger of Allah (SAAW) for whosoever hopes for Allah and the Last Day, and remembers Allah much." [Al-Ahzab: 21].
"It is not for any believer, man or woman, when Allah and His Messenger) have decreed a matter, to have the choice in their affair. And whosoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger (SAAW) he has gone astray into manifest error." [Al-Ahzab: 36]. 
If you really want to do research on the Prophet, sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam, the best place to start is the Qur'an or Allah's words. Because at the end of the day- who are you going to believe? People or Allah? 

Allah says that the Prophet had the best manners:
 And indeed, you are of a great moral character. (4) 

I also really need you to check this earlier post we wrote out 'loving and obeying the Prophet":

And..... have you read our article on women? Because, the prophet sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam was actually described by a few historians as being one of the first 'feminists' (in the sense that he promoted equality between the sexes). The prophet was a champion of women's rights.....

And it wasn't like it was 'just talk'...the Prophet Sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam practiced what he preached:

Aisha said, "Prophet Muhammad used to stitch his clothes, milk the goats and help in the chores inside the house.' (Bukhari and Muslim)
He didn't say "That's women's work. That's beneath me". He helped in the house, sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam. He also asked his wives, like Umm Salama, their opinion on important matters. He didn't think that women's opinions were 'less valid' then 'men's'...

He was also very much against 'women beating' and as we said before, he never ever hit his wives. When his wife Aisha Radiya Allah Anha was 'accused' of infidelity (zina), he didn't slap her or beat her or anything of that sort. You know what he did? He simply told her:

“Thereafter, O ‘Aisha! I have been informed such and such a thing about you; and if you are innocent, Allah will reveal your innocence, and if you have committed a sin, then ask for Allah’s forgiveness and repent to Him, for when a worshiper of Allah confesses his sin and then repents to Allah, Allah accepts his repentance”.

Can you imagine? The Prophet Sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam told Aisha Radiya Allah Anha that even if she had betrayed him ( Sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam) and had done such an act, all she had to do was sincerely repent to Allah and ask for forgiveness. Again, 'no beating'....'ve read all that, but you still don't 'connect' to the Prophet?

Let's work on that, okay :)

You know how earlier I told you that Prophet Mohammed cared about the poor people of his followers? Well, let me share with you a story:

- A black woman - or a young black man- used to sweep al-Masjid al-Nabawi. When the Prophet (sallah Allahoo alyhee wa saalm) did not see her (him) for a while, he asked about her (or him).  “She (he) died,” they told him. “Why did not you inform me?” said the Prophet. The companions did not attach importance to her (him). “Show me her (his) grave,” continued the Prophet. They showed him the grave. He prayed for him/her.

You might think 'Yeah, so what? I"m not impressed". Well the thing is, it’s easy for us to read these things- but when we apply to them to what happens today, we realize how special the Prophet was. Imagine the president of the country praying for a 'simple' janitor or ‘maid’? Actually noticing that person wasn’t there anymore? From all the people he talked to and knew?

I'm sure you've also heard of how merciful the Prophet sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam was...Like how he forgave the Qurayshis even after all the years they mocked, tortured him and plotted against him.

But let me give you another specific story:

Have you heard of the man Abdullah bin Ubai? He was one of the leaders of the hypocrites in Madinah. He did everything he could to undermine the prophet's authority. Like when the Muslims were going to the battle of Uhud, just before they reached Uhud, he convinced 300 out of the 1,000 Muslims (almost a third of the army!) to go back!

Later on, he was quoted as saying an Arabic saying which is like: Feed your dog, one day it shall eat you. You know, you continue to feed your dog, make it grow large, huge, strong, and ferocious and one day your dog will pounce on you and devour you. He was referring to the Muslims of Makkah being like dogs-istagfirAllah.

So why do I bring him up? Because of what happened after he died.

Narrated Hadrat Ibn 'Abbas (may Allah be pleased with him): When 'Abdullah bin 'Ubai died, his son 'Abdullah came to Allah's Messenger (may Allah's blessings and peace be upon him) and asked him to give him his shirt in order to shroud his father in it. He gave it to him and then 'Abdullah asked the Prophet (may Allah's blessings and peace be upon him) to offer the funeral prayer for him (his father). Allah's Messenger (may Allah's blessings and peace be upon him) got up to offer the funeral prayer for him. Sayyidina 'Umar got up too and got hold of the garment of Allah's Messenger (may Allah's blessings and peace be upon him) and said, "O Allah's Messenger! Will you offer the funeral prayer for him though your Lord has forbidden you to offer the prayer for him ?" Allah's Messenger (may Allah's blessings and peace be upon him) said, "But Allah has given me the choice by saying:-

'Whether you ask forgiveness for them, or do not ask forgiveness for them; even if you ask forgiveness for them seventy times never will Allah forgive them. That is because they disbelieved in Allah and His Messenger, and Allah does not guide the defiantly disobedient people..' (9:80)
So I will ask more than seventy times." 

Sayyidina 'Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) said, "But he (Abdullah bin 'Ubai) is a hypocrite!" However, Allah's Messenger (may Allah's blessings and peace be upon him) did offer the funeral prayer for him! (Later, though Allah revealed that we should not pray for the hypocrites).

But what am I getting at here? Prophet Mohammed never repaid 'meanness' with meanness. I mean, look how angry we get when someone 'backbites' us and pretends to be our friend. What do we do, right? This guy was a million times worse than someone backbiting us- he was a leader of the hypocrites who tried every chance they could to destroy Islam, yet the Prophet sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam, out of his mercy, prayed for him.

How else was the prophet sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam so extraordinary?

Let me give you another scenario. Imagine you're sitting down at a dinner table with the King of a country. He's sitting next to a little boy (on his right) and next to him on his left are 'elderly men'. Do you think the King would even bother with the little boy? That he would ask permission from him to let the 'elderly men' drink first? Well, the prophet sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam did that:

"Do you mind if I give the drink to them?’ The young boy said: ‘O Prophet of God! By God! I would not prefer anyone to drink from the place you drank. This is my fair share.’ The Messenger of God (sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam) handed the boy the drink." (Bukhari #2319)

What about the fact that the Prophet was so easy-going?

There was a companion named Abdullah who really loved the Prophet and loved to present him with gifts like 'butter and honey'. The funny thing is that when the seller demanded payment, Abdullah would bring the seller to the Prophet sallah Allahoo alyhae wa salam and say: “Give this man its price."

The Prophet, may the mercy and blessings of God be upon him, would then say: “Didn’t you give it to me as a gift?”Abdullah would say: “Yes, O Messenger of God; however I cannot afford to pay.” The two of them would laugh together and then the Prophet would have the merchant paid.

And you know what? Abdullah actually had a bit of a drinking problem. One day, when Abdullah was leaving from having the punishment of drinking done to him, one of the Companion’s declared about Abdullah: “O God curse him! How often he is summoned for this!”

The Prophet sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salm rebuked that Companion, saying: “Do not curse him, for I swear by God, if you only knew just how very much indeed he loves God and His Messenger.” (Saheeh Al-Bukhari).

What else? Well, I think it's important that you hear him talk...Just listen to some of his sayings, Sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam

- “The best perfect believers are the best in conduct and the best of you are those who are best to their wives” (Ahmed)
- “He who strives to serve a widow and a poor person is like the one who strives in Allah's way."
- "God has sent me to perfect good manners and to do good deeds." (Bukhari & Ahmed)
- “Allah is gentle and loves gentleness. He gives for gentleness what He does not give for harshness, nor for anything else.” [Muslim] In another hadith, he says, “He who is deprived of gentleness is deprived of good.” [Muslim]
- “If a man loves his brother in faith, he should tell him that he loves him.”[Abu Dawud]
- "I start the prayer with the intention of lengthening it, but when I hear a child crying, I shorten the prayer, as I know its mother would suffer from his screams!" (Bukhari #677)

In all honesty, there is soooooooooooo much more that we can write about the Prophet sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam, but there just isn't any time and I didn't want to delay replying to this anymore...

My question for you though is how can you love him when you don't really know him? 

And sister, I leave you with some final thoughts. You've written several comments on this blog and you've mentioned that you 'don't like to follow all the rules"....Well sis, I have to ask you this question and I mean it in the nicest way possible: then who is turning Islam into their own religion? Prophet Mohammed sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam didn't turn Islam into a religion about him. He was chosen by Allah to be an example for us-- when we choose to ignore the example and follow our own 'desires'/opinions on religion, then we're saying that Allah made a 'mistake' and din't know who to pick as a prophet...istagfirAllah. We're also telling Allah that we don't want to worship Allah the way He wants. We're saying that we want to worship Him the way we want...and it doesn't really make sense for the 'created' to decide how to worship the Creator, does it?

I pray that you do not take this message harshly and realize that I honestly do care about you. I know you think I'm against 'happiness" and 'everything nice/ and good' but I'm really not. I think it's such a shame if you were to lose out on knowing the real Prophet Mohammed...

Please do keep in touch with us.

Little Auntie and Little Miss Aunty

p.s. we've already also addressed his marriage to Aisha radiya Allah Anha.

28 wonderful sprinkely thoughts:

SonrisaMaria June 24, 2011 at 11:41 AM  

Sis, I love what you do and everything, and I love this site. I also respect Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) greatly. I just want to bring up the fact that even though I have a desire to learn more about Islam, sometimes I don't read the entire post because it's really long & looses me. When your addressing someone who purely doesn't care, DISLIKES (astagfirullah) our Prophet (peace be upon him) who are loosing her with the long post. She WILL NOT read the entire thing. A short, to the point response would help someone more. And the last paragraph about her turning Islam into her own religion was very good, but I wonder if she read that far into it...
I hope you understand-
I love the effort you put into this, but not everyone is as patient as you to understand all of this.
I'm sorry if this comes out a little "mean" sounding, just wanted to share my opinion. thank you

PS. I did read this entire post; there were amazing examples in it.

Little Auntie June 24, 2011 at 11:56 AM  

You know, I was thinking that, Sonrisa Maria...that's a GREAT point and I was concerned with the fact that it might be too long and she would lose interest. Thanks a lot for your suggestion :) Please, never apologize for such a great comment. I really NEED comments like that :D

Safiyah June 25, 2011 at 4:17 AM  

Very beautiful post, mashaAllah :-) Very well explained too!

I think however, that if this girl has this kind of views about Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) that it perhaps has got something to do with her upbringing? I mean, I don't like how she told that her parents hit her for not liking Prophet Muhammed (pbuh) but it seems like they never really took the trouble to tell her about him, how he really was. Do they even know how he was really like? Maybe people in her environment even told her what she believes about the Prophet (pbuh), that it's ok to hit women because the Prophet (pbuh) told so, according to them? And obviously she does care, since she came her to challenge her views.

Just a thought ;-)

Anonymous,  June 25, 2011 at 4:28 AM  


You know, I am usually one of those who skim-reads but this post was different. Even though it is a long post, I read the whole thing, word-by- word. It was so suspenseful for me. I was like holding my breath sometimes too. MashAllah. It was amazing reading it. Even though I had heard most of these examples, I loved hearing them this way. All of them linked in a way. SubhanAllah.

And I also love that our beloved, Muhammad(S) showed us how to be kind and loving to everyone, especially those that are most often oppressed and exploited in an uncaring society. i.e. Women, Children, Elderly, Widows, Orphans, the Disabled, Animals, the poor, etc. All of these groups are protected and have rights in Islam. And not just man-made rights but Rights given to us from AllshSWT who knows us the best, even more than ourselves. That's so amazing. Seriously, I think if I didn't know this, then I would have been a "feminist" and vegetarian. I would see injustice but would not know the right way to counter it. but Alhamdulilah, now I know that looking into Islam for Women's Rights is actually more complete and reasonable and correct. (it's ok that there are differences in duties, it's actually much better than comparing two things that are not similar.) And That eating animals isn't the cruel part, it's if adab isn't followed in how we treat them and slaughter them, (which again AllahSWT gave us the rules for them, too!)So, it's so cool, really. SubhanAllah, every time I see injustice and inequality I am positive it has been derived from culture or something else and has nothing to do with Islam. May AllahSWT open all of our hearts to the amazingness of his religion, Islam. It truly is perfect.

Little Auntie June 25, 2011 at 4:30 AM  

^Yes, Safiyah, that's something I thought, too. I didn't mean that 'she doesn't care', but I meant sometimes our posts really can be too long! Hehe :)

In the original comment where she wrote that, I told her how sorry I was that her parents hit her :( I'm very sad to see parents responding to such a question like that :( Some parents don't realize how much they are repelling their children from islam...especially with backwards cultural practices!

And definitely what you said about her environment, I believe that's very true. Alahmdillah, for my father alhamdillah! I really can't say that enough :)He helps cook in the house, always took care of us, didn't differentiate between me and my brother...and I knew he did that because he was practicing, ma'shaAllah and wanted to follow the Sunnah of the prophet :)

So, to the sister who turned this in, let us know what you think? We really don't this conversation to end here..I want us to talk about this :)

Hana,  June 25, 2011 at 4:59 AM  

When I realised what the subject was going to be I didn't expect there to anything new for me to read but surprise surprise u amde a very good job out of explaining the prophet's qualities and I for one didnt find it long at all, kept me interested d whole way. Keep it up little auntie!

fatimah June 25, 2011 at 9:17 AM  

Again, another beneficial post.:)
This kind of question is continously asked by non-muslims too. new muslim sisters also took time to understand how wonderful person our Prophet(sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam) was.
To learn about his life is essential part of our religion... how one cannot read up this. especially she raised the question. May Allah increase our love to Muhammad(sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam) and give us more wisdome, patience.

Aziza June 25, 2011 at 12:57 PM  

I definitely found my love for our Prophet (peace be upon him) increased by this post. I think we all need such reminders as this every now and then. If this doesn't change the sister's mind inshallah, I don't know what will! May Allah reward you, little auntie team. You actually remind me of my own aunt, she's always helpful, non judgmental no matter what, and genuinely cares. :)

Shireen Baig June 25, 2011 at 11:13 PM  

O my Allah! I simply LOVED this post, just last night at the seerah class we were talking about Prophet (saws) giving his cloak to be used for Abdullah Ibn Ubai's coffin.

To the sister who has asked this question,
I write this to you from my personal experience, When you would know about HIM (saws) trust me ! You would LOVE HIM! Imagine, Allah SWT himself praises the Prophet SAWS in the Quran numerous times.

Imagine, someone constantly praying for the forgiveness of his people even though his sins were all forgiven, he did not think 'as long as I am safe, its all good' no... he would make really hardcore dua for his Ummah, even on his deathbed he was concerned about us, You and I. Check out his last sermon and you would know that even in his last sermon, the sermon of great importance he advises his people to treat their women properly.

I have been in a similar situation as you are, I was a big feminist who thought Islam was not based on fair rulings, women were oppressed, why was prophet (saws) married so many times.. And these doubts kept increasing because I was reading all these things online, and these articles written by people who clearly had no idea about islam yet they projected it as an ancient concept based on injustice.

So, I started reading books from reliable sources about him, not just any online forum. Listening to the scholars talk about him, and watching videos.

If you think He (saws) was not really a good husband then read this , its a short and amazinggg book

Please check out this link to know how Merciful the Prophet (saws) was..

And if you are more of an audio person, then you can download life of Muhammad from here

The Sealed Nectar : This Biography of the Prophet saws is one of the most authentic, I would totally recommend to you to buy it or read it here

If you don't to want to read the above book because its too long, then try out these short one



You can find all bookks on Prophet Muhammad here :

IF you are still reading this comment, then know that Shaytan is getting panicked as you read about these sources and he's gonna whisper to you that this is too much of info but really sis give it a shot. Try to learn about him and you will realize that he's not even 1% of what the so-called media portrays him as.. all your misonceptions will be cleared.

And We are always here for you :) If you have ANY ANY ANY question or confusion, don't keep it dwelling in you just straight away ask it out to any of us.

P.s. I know my comment's long but remember there's a BIGGG difference between culture and Islam, People and Islam. People are NOT perfect, which is why you might encounter some harshness when you ask questions like these but Islam is perfect. Don't let culture ruin your deen.. I've been there and hated religion at some point in my life, before trying to gain knowledge of course. :)

Shireen Baig June 25, 2011 at 11:49 PM  

I am very tempted to mention a few things about His marriage to Aisha (RA);

1. Before getting married to Prophet (Saws) she was already engaged to another man. It was a norm in the society of that time to have the girls married at an early age. Now, you have to keep in mind that the girls that time were not like girls these days. Even though, I am 20 I know for a fact that I am veryy immature. But the girls that time were very mature and understanding at a young age.

2. Prophet (SAWS) had a dream about this marriage. And the dreams of the prophets are not just dreams they have a divine message in it. So he did not marry her, just because he wanted to, It was a divine will. It was dream from Allah SWT and later when you know about her qualities it even makes sense as to why He married her.

3. Prophet (SAWS) was NOT looking forward to get married for his own desires. When He (SAWS) lost khadijah (RA) he married Sawda (RA) who was a widow that time. She was an OLD woman so had he wanted to get married for other rubbish resons that people mention, he would have gotten married to a pretty young girl.

4. Prophet (SAWS) was SO loving, SO caring with her that even when she raised her voice over prophets' his father was about to beat her and HE (Saws) saved her and they joked about the whole situtaion.

5. Did you know half of the rulings of Shariah are based upon the knowledge of FIQH issues that the scholars took from Aisha (RA)? She was THIS smart! WE should be thankful as muslims that was Married to Him otherwise we'd have no rulings to work with and we'd be in darkness of ignorance over many matters. She was 1 of the top 5 narrators, the 3rd one to be precise. She narrated 2000+ ahadith, imagine that.

6. Finally, just THINK about this, If Aisha (RA) was not happy, do you think that she would keep quiet? She was a girl of a VERY strong and BOld charatcer. She used to ask so many questions to Prophet about the Islamic Rulings, Do you think this person would keep mum if she was not happy? or If she thought what happened to her was unfair?

Okay, we may think 'yeah maybe she was scared of her safety thats why she didn't complain' but hey what did she have to say after his death? She had ONLY good things to talk about him.

Anonymous,  June 26, 2011 at 12:07 AM  

JazakAllah lil Auntie for the post, it reminded me of so many things that we have sort of forgotten. I found many examples that i can learn from, e.g the example about his forgiveness of Abdullah bin Ubai. I mean we find it hard to forgive the smallest of mistakes that even our FRIENDS make and here we have our Prophet forgiving the leader of the HYPOCRITES! SubhanAllah. Also i loved the example where u mentioned how gently he turned away the face of his companion during Pilgrimage. Amazing. I mean, if only we could remember such things in daily life and avoid frustrating situations simply by thinking and reminding ourselves that if the Prophet SAW was so forgiving and gentle, we can atleast try to be like him!
InshaAllah this post will help me remember the cahracter of the Prohpet SAW and help me in day to day life, Ameen.

dawnrose June 26, 2011 at 1:33 AM  


Well, reading this post, Alhamdulillah, has boosted my love for the Prophet! I could actually feel the love coming in my heart as I read about the man of the greatest moral character! :)

To address the issue of the questioner ...
First of, I would like to say that I am deeply sorry about what she has been through. :( I would love to convey my love and hugs to her! I TOTALLY understand the reasoning behind her questions and how she posed them. Once upon a time, I use to feel that way, too. No, not the dislike towards the Prophet. No, I did not believe that the Prophet beat women. I was upset about the marriages part, and the issue about Aisha. I did not consider the reasoning behind the marriages, nor did I know of the simply beautiful way he treated all the wives, and Aisha. No one was treated unequally. I was in awe as I read the hadith of how this man treated women greatly! I recommend reading on that from the RIGHT sources.

Anyways, this beating thing is NEVER encouraged nor allowed in Islam. I was shocked that the questioner had to go through that. Let me tell you what the Prophet said:

“Beware of injustice, for oppression will be darkness on the Day of Judgement; and beware of stinginess because it doomed those who were before you. It incited them to shed blood and treat the unlawful as lawful.”

The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, “Verily, Allah gives respite (time to correct the wrong behavior) to the oppressor. But when He seizes him, He does not let him escape.” Then he (PBUH)) recited, “Such is the Seizure of your Creator when He seizes the (population of) towns while they are doing wrong. Verily, His Seizure is painful (and) severe”. (11:102).
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim]

Certain cultural practices do not encourage counselling nor advising as the Prophet did. Islam and culture are frequently at odds. It's regretful that the parents resorted to such a crude matter, and it needs to be resolved. I'll leave that bit to the other more knowledgeable sisters to enlighten.

Anyways, as I was reading through the comments I saw that some people advised about the length of the post and how the questioner would respond. That's a good tip with merit, but my take on this is that the questioner would definitely read through that long post, because it's relevant to her current situation and it's a matter of soul searching. A lot of us would grab at the opportunity to finally understand the confusing questions in our heads. Perhaps to others who don't find the question relevant to themselves would merely skim through it.

That being the case, the questioner would most probably want a lengthy answer to settle the confusion. I know I would. I would not want a few pointers and a short post. This long post means sincere care and carefulness of the answerer, to which I pray Allah Blesses the Little Auntie with His Love and Mercy! Not only that, but the Little Auntie put her words of comfort and advice, which would understandably make the post longer, wouldn't it? This blog wouldn't be as popular as it is, Alhamdulillah,if the aunties did not answer with patience, wisdom, kindness and in a sisterly manner. :)))) *continued

Umm Khaleel June 26, 2011 at 2:03 AM  

Assalam alaikoum wa Rahmatullaah wa Barakaatuh :)

Little Auntie, I have to agree with other sisters that the post is rather long but I think if I was in your situation as well, I would be writing that length too! There are ample examples of Prophet sallallahu alayhi salam's character and conduct towards community, people around him, his family, wives, children, animals and even the disbelievers! Going through all the examples you pointed out sis, I kept saying Masha Allah under my breath because Prophet sallallahu alayhi salam's character just amaze me!

To the sister who asked the question, insha'Allah if it's too long, then read through this part by part. I used to think why do Muslims love the Prophet of Allah so much..? He simply delivered the message to the Ummah, what's the big deal of it? But as you read through the Seerah of Prophet sallallahu alayhi salam, you'll be amazed too with how he treated everyone.

There's a saying in my language,"tak kenal maka tak cinta" which means (to translate word for word): "you won't love something/someone if you have no knowledge of it" (haha sorry, poor translation). Same goes for the Prophet sallallahu alayhi salam, if you study from the correct sources about who he was, your perspective of him would change drastically insha'Allah :)

There are non-Muslims who have written books about the Prophet sallallahu alayhi salam after studying about him and they too, are impressed by his character and his influence on everyone even till today. Allahu Akbar!

katerina_lily,  June 26, 2011 at 8:20 PM  

As'salaam sistaas <3
I just want to say that this post is the most wonderful post ever! It made me cry and cry and I hope that, in sha'Allah this sister begins to fall in love with Rasulullah after reading it.

dawnrose June 27, 2011 at 4:45 PM  

Wa'alaikumussalam to the sisters who greeted everyone in the comments! :)

*continued from my comment above

This article is really unique because it addresses an issue which is actually starting to get rampant! :O Yeah, you can't blame people because they're getting this really warped perception of Islam. :( As I was talking about the length, I agree with katerina_lily; the choice of words and the way the post was written was definitely exciting and made me want to scroll down. So I forgot about the length! :P

I guess it depends on how good the post is, though. The fact that Little Auntie was trying to explain the good things our Prophet did was also another reason the post was long. Because there are just so (too) many examples of the Prophet's character to be put into a single post. But still, it's best to take advice from the majority since I and a few sisters who liked the length are not everybody. We simply enjoyed this amazing article, may Allah Bless the Little Auntie. :)

My suggestion should be that you keep it at medium length but still interesting enough, still in your own unique-aunties way, and still addresses the question. Not short and sweet. Medium and sweet!

Also we should express our support for the questioner and help her avoid this beatings. :(

May Allah Bless the aunties of this blog! :))

Little Auntie June 28, 2011 at 3:07 AM  

Anonymous (I believe the original person who posted the question:) wrote in response to our thread:

thank you i read it ..
but im sorry
i really sorry im struggling with the whole " beating woman " is allowed in islam..
my husband can hurt me if he wishes dad hits my mom but he will still get heaven but what if my husband hurts me... what can i do? in the muslim socitey a divorced woman is like trash.. and Aisha was 9!
and jihad ? killing non believers ?
im so sorry but all these things scare me i lot
i do not want to be disrespectful i am really not
im struggling to understand ..i am trying.. even when i pray i have the thoughts in the back of my mind...
n sister u might tell me its Satan but itd me not getting it .. i am sorry
im very depressed coz of this i get nightmares

ymous, June 27, 2011 10:13 PM


sister doesn't these disgust u ? these are just a couple of stories but there are so many more...
they say "Muhammad is our role model .. we fallow him so we r allowed to marry 6 year olds.. even one year olds.."
i cry myself to bed every night
i feel ashamed..feel like its my fault
... ok so back then Muhammad's marriage to aisha was sooo long so.. but so many muslims are stil doing it today..
I am scared .. wen i get marred and have a baby girl wat if my husband wants to marry my little baby off witha 50 year old when she is 6! i have soo scared .. i feel ashamed and guilty
I want to be muslim i really do but these things scare me soo much
i dnt know wat to do
im sorry sister

Anonymous,  June 28, 2011 at 12:53 PM  

My heart goes out to the sisters.
i myself was having similiar questions, not about the Prophet s.a.w but about womens rights in Islam.
I feel that if i just put them at the back of my mind, they go away. That why i don't have to think about them and i don't have any doubts. However the more i listen to lectures on marriage and women in Islam, the same questions and doubts return to me.
I would advice the sister to try and forget it all until she can sit face to face with a reliable scholar who can answer her questions. Thats what im currently hoping will happen Insha Allah.

Improving My-muslim-self June 29, 2011 at 5:33 PM  

This is one of my favorite blog sites. May Allah reward you for the effort you put into this article. Inshallah, Allah will give the girl hidayat to actually read this reply to her statements. Once again, I love your blog, format, design.. everything about it! :)

Little Auntie June 30, 2011 at 10:14 AM  

AnonymousseS, insahAllah we'll be replying to you :) Please stay tuned/ keep in touch.

Jazakillah khair to all the sisters here for their input and personal opinions, ma'sahAllah. Your comments help us to better help y'all, so we really appreciate them :)

zari June 30, 2011 at 12:27 PM  

Dear little aunties, this was a wonderful, wonderful post masha'allah! You guys are just amazing, subhanallah. May Allah ta'ala reward you all with jannatul firdaus

fatimah June 30, 2011 at 8:04 PM  

I can understand the 'fear' though. Even I sometimes get afraid of access youtube because of some uncomfortable video titles like: Muslim attacked xxx place, Islam allows beating women etc.
The fear can be cured by having good muslim surroundings and continously study about issues from reliable source.

and think about it... basically... If a Muslim want to live a life to please Allah, then he want to make his marriage life sound. He want to find a wife who click well to him and mature enough to keep the marriage life peaceful and talk over important matters in household. Those men would not marry to 1 year old girl.
Our Prophet(Salaallao allaihi wa ssalam) was able to lead marrige with Aisha successful and Aisha became most knowledgeable sahaba. but I think not any muslims are allowed to marry young girls. For the sake of the girl and his own future. Well. i thought so. plz correct or add sth to this:)

i-Hijabi July 2, 2011 at 12:25 PM  

Salaam sister, I was thinking of writing a post on our beloved prophet pbuh, about him as a man, a father, a husband, can I re-post this on my blog, with full reference to you and your blog inshaAllah?

It's an amazing post and the way you have written it really brings tears to my eyes mA, how can anyone not love such a perfect man?

Umm Khaleel July 3, 2011 at 5:36 AM  

Assalam alaikoum wa Rahmatullaah wa Barakaatuh,

To the dear sister who asked the question: Al-Hamdulillah, I'm glad that at least you are asking these questions rather than keeping it to yourself :) I know people who would rather keep silent than pose these controversial questions but in the end, the burden falls on themselves because they will always wallow in their ignorance and not try to seek the truth.

What I would like to suggest to you dear sis however, is that if you decide to learn about the truth, than you should try learning from the correct sources. I saw the videos that you posted about the child marriage and that they are in no way representative of Islam..

Let me ask you a question.. If you're going to learn how to drive a car, would you learn from someone who doesn't and can't drive a car? You would tell me obviously not because that would not make sense. The same goes to Islam, if you are really intent in finding answers to your doubts, then insha'Allah start by learning from those who understand, practice and live Islam. Be sincere in your quest for truth by pushing away all these misconceptions first and then start reading from the correct sources, asking questions from those with knowledge and ask for guidance too!

As for your parents mistreating you just because you dislike Prophet sallallahu alayhi salam, if the Prophet was here today, he would be angry seeing how you were treated. Prophet sallallahu alayhi salam loved children very much and there were narrations about him hugging, kissing and playing with the children when he was around them and they all loved him too. I feel sorry that you are punished for something you do not know about. That's not right subhan'Allah..

Little Auntie July 4, 2011 at 2:13 AM  

Sister, I did not watch those videos because they would probably disgust/upset me. Let me ask you a question- why don't the people copy the fact that the prophet sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam married older widows? Divorced women? A woman whose husband apostated? If they really want to imitate the Prophet's example, why don't they go and take care of the orphans? If they really want to follow his example, there are a million and one incredible things they could do that would make this world a better place...

Sister, there will ALWAYS be people who twist religion to fit their own 'desires'- it's up to us to learn our religion correctly so we don't fall into such traps. Our job is to learn what Islam is really about and to help teach others its true teachings.

If YOU learn your rights and marry a person well grounded in the deen, I'm sure there will be no reason to go to sleep terrified/ scared.

Umm Khaleel- Jazakillah khair. well said, :) ma'shaAllah.

teeraljannah July 6, 2011 at 5:02 PM  

As salamu alaykum,

Could you please post the source for the hadith about RasoolAllah (sawws) praying the funeral prayer for Abdullah bin Ubai? JazakAllahu khair!

Little Auntie July 7, 2011 at 12:50 AM  

wa'alykum as salam wa rahmatullah wa barkatoo,
Sure Noshi.

You can get it from the tafisr of the verse 9:84 by Ibn Kathir:

Al-Bukhari recorded that Ibn `Umar said, "When `Abdullah bin Ubayy died, his son, `Abdullah bin `Abdullah, came to the Messenger of Allah and asked him to give him his shirt to shroud his father in, and the Messenger did that. He also asked that the Prophet offer his father's funeral prayer, and Allah's Messenger stood up to offer the funeral prayer. `Umar took hold of the Prophet's robe and said, `O Allah's Messenger! Are you going to offer his funeral prayer even though your Lord has forbidden you to do so' Allah's Messenger said,

«إِنَّمَا خَيَّرَنِي اللهُ فَقَالَ:

(I have been given the choice, for Allah says:

[اسْتَغْفِرْ لَهُمْ أَوْ لاَ تَسْتَغْفِرْ لَهُمْ إِن تَسْتَغْفِرْ لَهُمْ سَبْعِينَ مَرَّةً فَلَن يَغْفِرَ اللَّهُ لَهُمْ]

(Whether you ask forgiveness for them (hypocrites), or do not ask for forgiveness for them. Even though you ask for their forgiveness seventy times, Allah will not forgive them.)

وَسَأَزِيدُهُ عَلَى السَّبْعِين»

(Verily, I will ask [for forgiveness for him] more than seventy times).' `Umar said, `He is a hypocrite!' So Allah's Messenger offered the funeral prayer and on that Allah revealed this Verse,

[وَلاَ تُصَلِّ عَلَى أَحَدٍ مِّنْهُم مَّاتَ أَبَداً وَلاَ تَقُمْ عَلَى قَبْرِهِ]

(And never (O Muhammad) pray (funeral prayer) for any of them (hypocrites) who dies, nor stand at his grave.)'' `Umar bin Al-Khattab narrated a similar narration. In this narration, `Umar said, "The Prophet offered his funeral prayer, walked with the funeral procession and stood on his grave until he was buried. I was amazed at my daring to talk like this to the Messenger of Allah , while Allah and His Messenger have better knowledge. By Allah, soon afterwards, these two Ayat were revealed,

[وَلاَ تُصَلِّ عَلَى أَحَدٍ مِّنْهُم مَّاتَ أَبَداً]

(And never (O Muhammad ) pray (funeral prayer) for any of them (hypocrites) who dies.) Ever since this revelation came, the Prophet never offered the funeral prayer for any hypocrite nor stood on his grave until Allah, the Exalted and Most Honored, brought death to him.'' At-Tirmidhi collected this Hadith in his Tafsir [section of his Sunan] and said, "Hasan Sahih''. Al-Bukhari also recorded it.

Sa'dia July 9, 2011 at 6:32 PM  

assalamu alaikum

MashaAllah, a beautiful explanation on a beautiful blog! i truly admire your eloquence! You're doing a wonderful job here, sister. I make dua Allah gives you the strength to continue doing such good work, Ameen!

Anonymous,  January 27, 2013 at 5:29 AM  

Subhanallah. Very very well written. LOVED it, and LOVE the Prophet (pbuh). And Love to the sister who was wronged by her parents, May Allah help her and her parents see the right light. Ameen!

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Asalamu aialkum!
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