In Need of Hope.

>> Sunday, April 3, 2011

Assalamu alaikum aunties,
Im not sure how to say what i want to say but ill try inshaAllah. Hopefully i can get some reassurance or atleast some hope in my life.

i'm 17 years old, live in the UK, and i have this thing called PCOS(Polycystic Ovary Syndrome), its where you dont get your period regularly and it has some symptoms as well that i have too.
i was kind of shocked when i got my blood test results last year that i had this, but i wasnt too worried, i was 16 and i didnt care. but just last june i started praying and trying to get back onto the path of Islam alhamdulillah and now i care about my life and what im doing with it, now its coming to that age where my mum keeps speaking about marriage and i dont think i want to(even though i know that its right and stuff) because who wants a girl that might not be able to get pregnant??. i dont know what to do, this PCOS wont ever go away, of course i can get medicine and make it a bit better but the chances are that i wont be able to have a baby. And because of the PCOS thing i am a bit on the chubby side too and that weight doesnt come off easily and i hate it. my mum has been nagging me to 'lose weight, no one wants a girl who is fat'. 'Allah has given you a nice face, good skin, why are you ruining it by putting on weight?' 'when are you going to start losing weight??', shes been saying this for ages and i have tried explaining that it wont go away just like that! sometimes i just want to tell her that im not bothered anymore and i dont ever want to get married but i cant and just two days ago i considered telling her but i didnt because i do want to marry but i dont think anyone will want to marry me, :'(
on top of all this i have eczema as well on my arms, ears and chest and stomach which are side effects of some antibiotics i was on from two operations i had, one last year and one the year before.. this whole thing started when i was 15 btw...

please help me aunties, i dont know if you have any advice for this situation(and i know that this list of problems is really huge) but i have no one else that i can talk to about this without them judging me... sorry if i have wasted your time, i will understand if you dont have answers, i just wanted to let it all out, these past two years have been not really good .... :'(
May Allah Almighty reward you for this blog, it has helped me in rough times more than you know! (Please pray for me sisters...)

Salam :)


wa'alykum as salam wa rahmatullah wa barakatoo,

Dearest in Need of Hope,

awwwwwwwww, sis. I just wanna give you the biggest hug ever. It sounds like you're carrying the biggest weight around. I know when you're diagnosed with something, you can feel so terribly alone...like you're the only one who has it...and it gets to be even more lonesome when maybe your friends don't know about it. It's like you've got the biggest secret ever and like everyone is oblivious to your pain. You also mentioned that you have a lot of other problems and you've been suffering the last 2 years.

Let me tell you this right away:

The prophet (peace be upon him) said: "The greatness of the reward is tied to the greatness of the trial. When Allah loves a people, He puts them to the trial. Whoever is acceptant of it will have Allah's acceptance and whoever is displeased and unacceptant with it will gain Allah's displeasure." [At-Tirmidhi Kitab At-Tauhid]

Also:
Narrated Abu Sa'id Al-Khudri and Abu Huraira: The Prophet said, "No fatigue, nor disease, nor sorrow, nor sadness, nor hurt, nor distress befalls a Muslim, even if it were the prick he receives from a thorn, but that Allah expiates some of his sins for that."

Now that we said that, I want you to know that I am soooooo glad you turned this question in because I happen to know several ladies diagnosed with PCOS and let me tell you something- yes, it is a life-long condition. BUT it is not the end of your life. It's just like any other life long condition- like diabetes/etc. It can be lived with. It can be managed.

Don't worry. I know how to read. I know that it can affect your changes of being pregnant. It does make it incredibly more difficult to get pregnant, but it doesn't mean that you 100% cannot get pregnant at all. Not at all. It just means you might have to try a little harder; there are things, you can do, steps you can take to minimize the effects of PCOS. We're talking various different ways from medical treatments (such as pills and the like) to natural treatments.....All you have to do is empower yourself with knowledge. Decide that you are going to deal with this and not be 'passive' about it. Talk to a doctor.You're living in the UK, huh? I'm sure you can get access to some really good doctors out there. See what you are more comfortable with and what your body responds to better.

Read books! It's much more common than you think and there are tons of books written on it.

Living with PCOS: ^As that image shows, you can actually read parts of this book online. Just click on it. It's highly recommended, too.

Here's another one:
PCOS: A Woman's Guide to Dealing with Polycystic Ovary Syndrome

Most of all, sis, never ever give up hope...

Who was it but Allah who allowed a burning fire to feel cold to Prophet Abraham? Who was it but Allah who saved Prophet Yunus when he was in the whale’s belly in the deep of the ocean in the pitch of the night? Who was it but Allah that allowed Prophet Moosa’s rod split the ocean into half and let the people of the Israelis cross?

Nothing, and I repeat, nothing is greater than Allah. It is He who created the stars, the sun, the moon- the Entire Universe. Not a word is uttered that He does not Hear it. Not a problem occurs, that He can not solve- not a thing in this world, that He is not Greater.

The truth is that dua can work miracles. It can. Turn to Allah. Trust in Him. He will get you through this.


I want you to watch this video by Muhammed Al Shareef who spent many years not being able to have a baby. Listen to what he says. 

Let's also take a look at this website dedicated to real success stories of ladies with PCOS who have had children

This is "Eva's story":
I was diagnosed with PCOS in early December 2002, after not have cycles since stopping the combined pill in April. An ultrasound showed I had PCOS. I was also having mild acne, I'd put on some weight and I felt generally sluggish. It turned out I also had an underactive thyroid (diagnosed October), but despite being treated for this my cycles did not reappear, hence the ultrasound. MY endo recommended metformin but I decided I'd prefer to try the natural approach for 6 months first. I immediately changed my diet, determined to lose the extra pounds, and also to make it more healthy - I followed a VERY strict low GI & organic diet. I had my hair tested which showed me to be deficient in a number of things including zinc, potassium and chromium so I took some supplements too. I watched out for signs of ovulation... and by the end of January I'd lost 15 pounds and I ovulated and conceived.

You can see her baby's picture and read more about the steps she took in detail, as well as her diet, etc. here

You can also join a forum where you can discuss your issue and get more support from women/girls going through what you are going through. 
Learn from their experience. You may find 'conflicting advice', but that's because each case is a little different. The idea though is you're not alone. You really aren't. Not only are there many women with the same problem, but Allah is right there, with you.

As for no one wanting to marry you, while it's very noble of you to consider your future spouses's desire to have children, sis, all you have to do is be honest with any suitors. Just explain your condition- explain that it might make it more difficult to have children. Will they have problems with that? Or are they still interested? Honesty is the best policy. Once you do that, it's up to them to read about it and decide if they're okay with it. You don't need to stress yourself out on that. Remember, also that marriage isn't only about having children. It's also about finding your partner- someone you can share your life with.

As for your mumzy telling you all the time to lose weight, she's worried about you. I'm not saying she's doing it in the best way, but...recognize that she loves you and doesn't want you to give up on yourself. Talk to her about needing her help to lose weight; see a nutrionist if possible. Ask your friends for their help/support. See if you can sign up for a girl's gym? Aerobics? Try walking! I walk like every day....(well, that's part of the charm of living in saudi and not being allowed to drive :P). Maybe you need an extra push-- there are diet pills. One of my PCOS friends was given that to her by her doctor (after she had tried going to the gym, dieting, etc.).

I know it's tough. I do. But realize that losing weight is actually considered an essential aspect to treating PCOS. Don't do it for looks. Don't do it for 'marriage'. Do it because part of the deen is seeking treatment. This sheikh states: Islam calls upon its followers to seek medication and cure by using all possible means and sources in addition to the divine sources such as the Qur'an and the hadith”

And all that we said for PCOS, applies to your eczema problems. Empower yourself with knowledge. And remember, that in Islam we are encouraged to marry people for their character. I want to show you something;

Let's take the story of the companion of the Prophet Ibn Masoud. (I mean let's literally take it because I am copy pasting it from: Here

Ibn Masoud was not distinguished because of his social status for he was a poor shepherd with no wealth, or because of his physical strength, for he was thin and frail. Yet he was dear and beloved by the Prophet, peace be upon him, who appreciated his sincere devotion and his eagerness for the knowledge of Islam. He once climbed a tree to get a twig for the Prophet, peace be upon him, to use as a miswak. When the Prophet's companions saw his thin legs, they laughed.. 

The Prophet, peace be upon him, said, "You laugh at ibn Masoud's legs! They are in the sight of Allah heavier in the Scale than the mountain of Uhud!" Perhaps your eczema scarred arms/ legs are the exact same. Perhaps they are heavier in Allah's sight than a mountain!


And remember...dearest sis....

He whom Allah has predestined to enter Paradise, the reasons which will cause his entrance shall spring from calamities; and he whom Allah has predestined to enter the Hellfire, the reasons which will cause his entrance shall spring from lusts.” Ibn Al-Qayyim

Maybe this is your ticket to jannah?

May Allah make things easier for you, sis. Please keep in touch/ write back to this post so that we know you saw the answer. I hope this helps you even a teensy bit. Always remember, we love you.



Readers if you suffer from PCOS/ have any words of hope for our sis, please share in the comments.

P.S. PLEASE WATCH this video. Think you can't get back up? Think you've fallen down? And that's it? Think again.

23 wonderful sprinkely thoughts:

Anonymous,  April 3, 2011 at 5:35 AM  

My dear sister, don't ever lose hope! I've read stories of women who were told by their doctors that they won't be able to conceive and despite that, they still managed to have children! Amazing eh? Don't forget that Prophet Zakaria alayhi salam was old and his wife was barren when they had a son, Prophet Yahya alayhi salam. Subhan Allah, Allah can give you whatever you want if you ask Him and if it's the best for you.

I wish I can give you more advice but I'll end off with this ayaah:

"..But perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you; and perhaps you love a thing and it is bad for you. And Allah Knows, while you know not." [2:216]

Sis, personally, when I'm faced with trials, I find this ayaah very difficult to swallow because you want something so badly but somehow just can't get it. However, after much reflection, I come to my senses that Allah always knows what's best for us even though it may be something we dislike. We may not be able to see the hikmah now but insha Allah in the future we might realise it. Watch this video insha Allah about a brother who suffers from a skin condition which made him depressed..May Allah grant you patience in facing difficulties in this life! *Hugs*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KTKpIhSbp9U&feature=player_embedded

-UmmKhaleelMujahidah

Hope,  April 3, 2011 at 6:42 AM  

Assalaam o Alaikum!

i had PCOS too, i had irregular periods, am over weight, and i had hair underneathe my chin, and the hair on my head thinned drastically.

then my cousin doctor took me to another doctor, who told me i had PCOS, he gave me hormones and told me to lose weight. The hormones regulated my cycles, alhumduLillah. and the hair thinning problem went away. i'm still over weight, but im working on it a daily basis. well. i am supposed to be.

don't worry about it, just pray real hard, and follow lil miss anty's advice *hearts* and remember that the source of all Hope is Allah! and that He loves you! that's why He put into your heart to take care of yourself!! *kisses*

And your mother. SHARE YOUR FEELINGS WITH HER!!!! :) Trust me. If you don't, she's never going to know! and she loves you more than any human alive on this planet! don't get put off, tell her how you feel, chances are she thinks you don't care, but tell her you do. She'll be able to set your heart at ease, just because you shared. My mother does the same for me. And i always end up apologizing for worrying her with my wierd concerns, but she just smiles and says, that she's grateful that she gets to find out what's going on in her daughter's head! because she's a mother! AlhumduLillah for all our mothers!

You see, darling, i've been over weight ever since i came into existance! i've been teased for it, bullied too, sometimes my friends left off because i wasn't pretty enough! i'm NOT telling you this because i'm sad, but because i want you to know how GRATEFUL i am to Allah (s.w.t)that because He made me like this, i am more aware of what true beauty is. I tend to be more accepting of people, and try to look for their positive points and ignore their negativity. This was a point i wasn't even aware of, until a close friend pointed it out. i was ever more grateful when she did, alhumduLillah! and she said that's what made me beautiful... *blushes* :D hehe.

And one more thing, no matter how pretty a girl is, if she isn't pretty on the inside, chances are, after the first few meetings, you'l try your level best to not get to meet her again! :P hehe. so what's more important, is that we beautify ourselves with a beautiful character - that of a Muslimah, inshaAllah. And slowly and surely, everything will fall into place.

Allah loves you. And He will take care of you. He is WITH those who do Sabr, when afflicted with a calamity.

And you. Are. BEAUUUUTIFUL! MashaAllah!! i can just tell by the way you write! *lots of kisses and hugs and duaaaaaaaaaaaz****

Amalina April 3, 2011 at 7:37 AM  

Assalamualaikum, dearest sister..
Subhanallah.. Allah gives this to you because Allah knows that you are strong.
don't ever lose hope, dear. Allah is always be with you. believe that now Allah is preparing the best gift for you. Allah will give the best gift for you that you haven't ever thought about it before. trust me, dear.

kisses and hugs,
Amalina.

Fida Islaih April 3, 2011 at 7:45 AM  

Salaam,

I think this is the most beautiful and touching post I've ever read! I have told any of my readers,, but keep it a secret. I also have a life long medical condition.

This post really helps with giving encouragement and hope. Thank you!

Anonymous,  April 3, 2011 at 8:41 AM  

Asalaamu Alaykum :)
May Allah help you Insha Allah. You're going through a lot right now.


As for the Eczema. I've had it since i was born. Its hard to deal with and the doctors just give you quick fixes that only make it worse. A doctor recommended i use Aveeno Skin relief moisturizing lotion, and Alhamdullah it worked!! I don't know if its sold in the Uk or not, but heres a picture.

http://www.tulumba.com/mmTULUMBA/Images/381370038825_250.jpg

I suggest you use it Insha Allah. If its not sold in the UK then use regular lotion. fragrance free of course. And use it daily. Keeping the skin moisturized is the main goal. Find a trust worthy doctor if you can Insha Allah
May Allah grant you Jannah and give you ajar for your patience.

x@hu April 3, 2011 at 12:56 PM  

To the darling sister in the letter! Honey, while I was reading it, I was having flashbacks! (This is going to be one looooong comment so I'm gonna divide it into two coz of the space restriction! :P)

That's right, I have PCOS too. I first heard about it when I was 14 when one of my best friends was diagnosed with it. I was all O_o, but never figured I'd end up with it too. As Hope said, I've been chubby ever since I came into existence, who would have thunk PCOS was the culprit? :P

When my doctor confirmed my erratic cycle was because of PCOS, I remember being all freaked out. I mean, I just saw my dream of having a husband & children go up in smoke (or so I thought). I called up my sister in a panic and she was like "What dear, u have PCOS? Ho-hum!" Yes, I thought she had crossed all limits of insensitivity too! :P

But then she told me something amazing. Our mom had PCOS (I never knew that!), but masha Allah she had FIVE children! My sister has PCOS (I never knew that either! Honestly, why is the baby of the family never told adult matters??), but I have an adorable niece! Her point being? Its nothing to freak out about becoz having PCOS duzn't mean you're infertile, it just means that it'll be a bit hard to conceive.

I was somewhat reassured becoz my sister was so nonchalant about the whole thing, but still the great big fear loomed that no man would ever marry me (what with the chubbiness & PCOS) and I'd never even get to the conceiving part to see if it would work for me like it did for mom and sis! Trust me, I've had horror fantasies about this countless times!

I wallowed in self pity & crushing insecurity & everything else u can think of. Wallowing in visions of myself dying as a frigid old maid no one ever marries (yes, I have a very active imagination :P)

Then my mom told me a story about an elderly couple who lived in our neighborhood. They were blessed with a bounty of wealth & health, but they were childless for nearly 2 decades. But finally Allah answered their most fervent du'aa and they were blessed with a beautiful daughter in their old age.

Do u know what my mom was trying to tell me? Everything, EVERYTHING is in the Hands of Allah subhanahu wa ta'aala dear sis. It duzn't matter if your ovaries are overloaded with cysts, if He wills for u to have a child, then u WILL!! It duzn't matter that you're so rolly polly u can't fit through the door, if He wills for u to be married, then u WILL BE!

Think about it, how many "normal" women are out there, who have trouble having children? How many skinny girls are out there, who are unmarried? We all have this problem of focusing too much on what's wrong with our little piece and we forget the big picture.

See, marriage and children, these are blessings from Allah that He bestows on whom He wills & withholds from whom He wills. Remember, when Allah withholds, He is actually Giving becoz He knows what you know not and our Rabb is NEVER cruel! Also, Allah has promised that He will never let a du'aa for something good go unanswered. If He doesn't grant it to you in this Dunya, then He is keeping it in store for u for the Hereafter!

I know it's depressing & scary & embarrassin right now, but trust me sweetie when I say I understand. The thing with men? They're actually not that shallow u know? I was all terrified thinking that no man would want a defective girl, but a level-headed caring brother will see past the minor inconvenience. A marriage is more than just having children, and there ARE brothers who understand that.

The one thing that gets me thru everything in life is absolute trust in Allah. Place your trust in Him sis, and see. Always remember that He tests us because He loves us, and if we're patient, then His rewards are unimaginable! :)

x@hu April 3, 2011 at 1:04 PM  

Okies, so coming to my comment number two, here's a bit of practical advice when dealing with PCOS.

One of the most important things is havin a regular doctor that you're totally comfortable with. This is something that you have to live with your whole life, so it'll be easier if you have a buddy for the long-run. Lol, I always pester my Gynecologist with panicky questions about never having children and she always reassures me that I'm not infertile. Your doctor can be a huge support for you, you know?

Has your doctor prescribed medicine to regulate ur cycle? Don't Ever Ever be careless with it! Take your pills regularly & insha Allah in a few years (by the time you reach your twenties), the cysts would have decreased. My friend has been cyst free for about two years now masha Allah. But she continues to take her meds because PCOS will come back if you don't keep it at bay (sucks huh? :P)

Next, for the eczema use a moisturizing cream that contains sodium PCA (that's the skin's natural moisturizer) and 10% urea. I use a brand called DermaDrate and al-hamdulillahi it works wonders! Smooth skin all the way for years! *dance dance*

And finally yes, the mother of all problems! The Weight! I hate it too! Especially hated it during my teens when I was surrounded by supermodel skinniness! :P Sigh, can't even look at a yummy brownie for fear the calories will leap out at you! :P

But seriously, it's not that hard either. You just need a bit of willpower and self-discipline! Exercise is a must (this is the part where I admit that I totally suck at it), but for the most part, if you watch what you eat and take your medication, then the weight loss gradually happens. It's tortoise slow yes, but if you hang in there, insha Allah it DOES work!

Let's see, have I missed anythin? Nope, I think that's pretty much it. Lol, I think I'll quit while there's still space in the comment section! But before I go, I just want to say, cheer up sis! You're not alone! *big hugs*

ummkhaleelmujahidah April 3, 2011 at 4:51 PM  

^Masha Allah at Sis Zahu's detailed explanation! :) Always trust her to give good advice al-hamdulillah!

TheOneWhoNeedsReminders April 4, 2011 at 3:05 AM  

Mashallah may Allah swt preserve the sisterhood, i am sooo happy looking at the wonderful advice given by the sisters.

To the questioner, Its true that PCOS is quite common. I know of my 2-3 cousin sisters who i've got to know from my mom have the similar problem. One of them mashallah now has 2 kids and her sister is still trying for a kid though, So yeah it might be difficult but Inshallah Allah swt will bring ease , just make Dua.

What I think could be more frustrating for you is that feeling that nobody around u is able to understand what you are going through. So here's the thing when our mothers don't really care to understand what we are trying to tell them, or when we feel that they show no interest in our problems. It is not because they don't love us (i know you've heard it before and your probably planning to strangle me right now ;)

I think it is because they either have not been in a similar situations or because sometimes they feel so helpless that they don't really know how to communicate the point across to us.

One verse that really speaks to me is ''Verily with hardship there is ease'' and i Know its the most commonly quoted one. But is is true sis, i mean imagine living for 70-80 years or 90 if we're lucky ;) now compare that to eternity!! woah!

Im so happy your back to Islam sis. Last night while we were studying the Name & Attribute of Allh swt, our teacher mentioned that 'Once you take hold of Allah's guidance, which happens only if you have a truthful and an open heart, then Allah swt will test you with trials and afflictions to see if you will really hold on to the guidance in the difficult times or give it up'.. Mashallah the way I see it, your holding it quite tight :) just be patient with all these problems and I know its easy to say all this when I am not goin through what you are. But sis, trust me all of us have our own BIG problems, we never know what type of pain other person is hiding behind their smiles... The only thing to keep in mind is that this life is just TEMPORARY, it is so small, all we need is little bit of patience then we're guaranteed an eternal bliss.

TheOneWhoNeedsReminders April 4, 2011 at 3:15 AM  

oh we were discussing the name Al-Hadi (the one who guides)

Part 2 of my comment ; like xahu, even i love leaving BIGGGG comments :P

My life between 17-19 were really difficult years, even before that I was a totally pessmistic soul filled with depression the minute im left on my own. And of course, there some really good reasons behind it.. which made me really dislike my mum.

By the time I was 19, I had done way too much harm for my own self. So I decided to go to a shrink, I used to cry like a baby during those 3 sessions. My mum knew about it, But she didn't even accompany me to the clinic, She could not understand what am I making a big fuss of, although she knew the reasons for it.

My shrink suggested i speak to my mum, when i told this to my mom .. she just replied 'I already have a headache..we'll try to talk about you some other time' and we never had that talk ... For a long time I thought she didn't care. But it is not that, sometimes it becomes difficult for mothers to talk about things with their kids, because they feel guilty sometimes. Doesn't mean she loves me any less.. now does it?

Give it time sis, WE are here for you <3 for anything you need.

You could really enjoy yourself in a gym btw.. I remember When I started working i used to be so much under stress and gymming really helped.

So Inshallah with little bit of motivation and lots of Dua all the problems will be resolved and one day you'd think to yourself 'SubhanAllah how all the problems got resolved? and i never even though about it' :D

- BIG GIGANTIC HUGS - :)

Little Auntie April 4, 2011 at 5:21 AM  

Sisters, I sincerely pray that In Need of Hope reads each and every one of your comments. Reading them made ME emotional- to see the sisterhood so alive.

May Allah bless each and every one of you.

Always remember: It was related on the authority of Abu Hurairah, radiyallahu 'anhu, that the Prophet, sallallahu 'alayhi wasallam, said:

"Whosoever relieves from a believer some grief pertaining to this world, Allah will relieve from him some grief pertaining to the Hereafter..."

GotTonsOfHope :D,  April 4, 2011 at 5:52 AM  

Salaam Alaikum sisters, its me- In Need of Hope, (although now i have got tons of hope MashaAllah!),i was eagerly waiting for the aunties to reply and when they did i was really thankful, aunties, you dont know how much you have helped me at this time in my life, your answers were just what i needed to try and take that next step(get treatment, put my trust in Allah that he has something planned for me, and to not ever lose hope), inshaAllah, in the Hereafter, you will get the biggest reward!! :D
and to the sisters who have commented with their advice, Alhamdulillah i cant express how much your comments mean to me, to know that we have sisters like you in this Ummah makes me so happy (^__^), some of these comments brought tears to my eyes and i really am grateful to Allah SWT that He has helped me through you!! JazakAllah, i dont know what else i can say, lol, but May Allah reward you all in this life and the Hereafter for this sincere advice! *GINORMOUS HUGS!*

xoxo :D

Anonymous,  April 5, 2011 at 9:32 AM  

Salam . when i read this post i was truly inspired Trust me . i get periods regularly but i suffer from alot of pain. ma stomach pains like Horribaly i Cry aloot, i use to read Duas n evrythng i did but didnt work and i dont feel better unless i dont go to doctor.but when i read about ur story i thought that the pain i go through is nothing as compared to what u r going through trust me now i m Thankful To ALLAH and u were all day in my mind when i read this. and Trust me i will never forget u in my prayer
Atleast i can do that =P

Take cAre <3

Tania April 9, 2011 at 10:49 AM  

....PCO.......!!! i think now a days its a common disease we hard almost every where...i m one of the member of this grp:D i shud say i was...how?i m going to tell u now...
Period problem is n was my one of the big big problem I m facing since it has started…Alhamdulillah I neve feel pain during period bt I alwys faced irregularity in my period for ages…my whole school n college life I never able to say any certain starting date of my period…n sumtimes I stopped counting how many days it is running!!! ): this one prb never let my prayer get regular too….the 1st 2 years of my period was fine bt after tht I faced these probz so I went to doc n widout any test she just gave me sum medicine,now I hv forgotten wht was the medicine n the medicine made me a FATTY!!
…bt now I know irregularity of period is one of the reason to become fat also ….so I stopped going to doc for a long time czz I was annoyed n paniced after having those medicine which made me fat..bczz I had to go through a lotss of insulting n etc things like u sisters in this long phase…bt my friends n family forced me to consult a good doc..As it’s a very imp matter for a female…so afterrrrrrr a long long time during my university life in 2008 I consult a good doc...she gave me test n found PCO in my USG report…bt I was nt paniced czz she told me to search by myself in internet…whts the cause n solution of this problem n I did it n she neve told me tht I will neve have baby for this in future...yaa I go through lots of medicine n test….i had to take pill to make my period regular…after evry 6 months had to go to the doc for test…yess she also told me to loss my weight…made me diet chart..which food to take n which nt…told me to do exercise…she told me how much my weight shud b according to my height…thn calculate how much I hv to loss…made me a target…though I m a bad girl czz in tht exercise thing I m little bit lazy :P
I was under tht doc observation for 1 n half year n still last year my period was regular n finally I was able to say definite starting date of my period…( 2008,09,10 was hectic years for me,czz another disease was knocking at my door,Allergy prob n for my allergy prob I consulted another doc on 2009 n on 2010 I became so so soooo much sick tht I stop taking treatment for my period prob bt again last December 2010 when I felt little prob, again consult wid another gynecologist cz alrdy tht time I was passing my 3rd months of marriage,so I thought I shud go through a normal check up)
this new doc again gives me sum test …PCO test also…n u knw wht…in this repot they didn’t find any cyst or PCO Alhamdulillah..i compared these two report, older has mentioned clearly as a Comment: Polycystic Ovary n the new one said No cyst Alhamdulillah…bt yess I hv sum hormone prob…thts why doc told me to conceive as early as possible n to consult a hormone specialist…these wholeeeee procedures /try/medication I hd gone though n still now goin, it sounds so easy bt I wasn’t ….only she knows who go through it…bt I tried my best..
Bt I want to say sis…u don’t knw wht Allah has planned for u…try to find a good doc n go through good treatment…n if u r healthy looking by born don’t care abt tht(me also fatty lady (;) bt if u hv over weight try to loss ur extra pounds…tht dsnt mean u hv to b skinny …czz over weight is also bad for health n creates other diseases…n marriage is sumthing which will held when n wid whom tht only Allah knows…jst make ur intentions good…InshaAllah u’ll hv so much luvin n caring life partner who will luv u as u r n care u as u r a new born baby..InshaAllah…n if nt thn Allah will give u such life partner n happy life wid dozen of children ;) in hereafter …tht is for sure…wordly life is consists of maximum 70/80 years n hereafter life is forever… now tell me which is better my luv?n dont stop making duazz

Anonymous,  April 16, 2011 at 5:48 PM  

Assalamu'alaykum!

Just wana say, "I LOVE ALL OF MY SISTERS!!!!"

For Allah's sake ;)

For sister in need of hope:

Never to lose hope! Be strong! Be firm! Verily Allah is with those who are patient ;)

Anonymous,  May 1, 2011 at 9:49 PM  

Asalam u 3LAYKOM MY SISTER

ABOUT PCOS
I HAVE TO SISTERS ONE AT THE AGE OF 25 AND ONE AT THE AGE OF 29 MY SISTER GOT MARRIED A LITTLE LATE WHICH IS NOT TYPICAL FOR US IT WAS AT THE AFE OF 27 SHE HAS PCOS HOWEVER HER HSBAND DIDNT CARE HER HUSBAND TREATS HER GREAT AND SHE COULDNT HAVE ASKED FOR ANYONE BETTER AL7EMDULLAH...ANWAY SHE DOESNT GET HER PERIOD EVERY MONTH SHE GETS IT EVERY 2 SOMETIMES THREE MONTHS HOWEVER WHEN SHE GOT MARRIED SHE GOT PREGNANT IN JUST TWO MNTHS .. NOTE HER DOCTOR TOLD HER THAT IT IS GOING TO BE EXTRA HARD TO GET PREGNANT AND THIS CAME FROM A DOCTOR IN THE UNITED STATES IN NEW YOK WHERE THEY HAVE THE BEST DOCTORS SO BASICALLY IM JUST SAYING INSHALLAH 5EER WITH THE WHOLE PREGNANCY AND MARRIAGE


WEIGHT LOSS

TRY A GLUETEN FREE DIET IM A LITTLE CHUBBY MYSELF LOL BUT I LOST A LOT OF WEIGHT FAST AND NOW MY WHOLE FAMILY IS ON THE DIET IF U NEED MORE ON THE DIET JUST LEAVE A POST ILL SEND U STUFF O JUST GOOGLE IT

JustAnotherSister,  July 20, 2011 at 1:18 PM  

It was quite surprising to find this post here. :D

The only thing I wana tell the questioner, my dear lil aunties, and all those big and small commenters.. I LOVE YOU ALL LOADS AND LOADS for the sake of Allah! :)

Getting straight to the point. Yes, even I've been diagonised with PCOS. and I have a feeling its due to lotts of emotional stress( Yeah u heard that right, emotional stress can also be a reason for PCOS).

Frankly I was really not so bothered when I realised what I was diagonised with, because I had loads of other unnecessary problems to worry about! I must mention I was into this deep love crap, Astaghfirulla, which was painful enough. So college was terrible hell! That's a long story we shall escape. The only reason I was a little worried about my irregular periods was because of my mom and sis. So when 6 months at a stretch I didnt get my periods.. (I must mention I never had regular periods from the beginning.. n like the other sister.. I never remembered dates+days for the same reason!!) .. my mom took me to this gynaec .. infact 2!!.. And when my problem was revealed my mom n sister got very panicky.. I rem my mom n sister used to wake up for tahajud just for me(I wasnt really practising back then) ..They kinda hid the whole thing from me.. bcoz they thought it'l effect me too much.. I remember my mom broke down once when I did not have my dinner the prev night and didnt wana breakfast either (.. yes.. the only difference is.. I have some weird PCOS .. and I am ..according to mom and others.. extremely underweight.. anyway.. Alhumdulillah for everything!:)) So yeah .. my mom started crying and that got me lil down because I didnt want my family to be affected coz of me!

I started pills for 3 months.. and when I stopped them I had my period for a month!.. but after that it became irregular again ..! I should also mention that in mean time my mom used to read Surah Al-fatiha 40 times between sunnah namaz of fajr and farz namaz of fajr!! .. And my periods actually started again! this was before I took my pills!! The point I'm trying to make is there is alot of strength in dua and prayers!!

Anyway so that happened! I should mention by the grace of Allah, alhumdulillah, i left all the haraam, and stopped talking to that guy i liked!.. I hate to even think of that now!ALHAMDULILLAH..How merciful is my lord who guided me to the right path! So yeah once I was out of the depression etc., that's when I actually realised what is happening with me internally .. meaning the PCOS!! ..

And just like you sister.. I do NOT want to marry a guy, when I know I have such a condition, but I know my parents will never let me tell him! But I know I should.. and I will inshallah, whenever the time comes! As of now, I'm just 20 .. so till then I'l try my best to bring myself back to a good health, Insha'Allah!..

The important thing to remember here is sister.. It's Allah who provides..! I always remind myself, that didnt Allah provide Zakriya(AS) with a child.. that too a very old age and even though his wife was barren! It was the power of dua sister!

JustAnotherSister,  July 20, 2011 at 1:18 PM  

Remember he created Hawa(AS) from only a male that is Adam(AS)..! And how can you forget .. he brought Prophet Isa(AS) from Maryam(R.A) .. So anything and everything can happen with his will!! So lets trust on him :) .. Remember, trusting him and asking him for help are the biggest keys! :) So let's keep praying..

I remember last time i didnt have my time of the month of almost 2 months and I cried in dua and prayed to Allah(SWT) for help .. and .. it did come :) .. I had my periods withing 2 weeks since that day, Alhumdulillah! :) .. So yeah, we've got the biggest key, dua! Let's trust that He will make everything right, Insha'Allah! :)

P.S.I wanted to end with a verse.. which I always think of when I think of this PCOS prob.. but I dont know the exact verse and have been searching for it on net since about an hour and cannot find it! :/ It is something like " ...and we blew life unto it and said it to 'be'!" .. I just very well remember the word "be" .. like u know we asked it to "be" meaning happen and so it did!.. Can any sister help to find it, please??!

Anonymous,  November 8, 2011 at 8:51 PM  

^ I don't know if this is the verse that Just AnotherSister is talking about, but maybe:


"And Maryam (Mary), the daughter of 'Imran who guarded her chastity; and We breathed into (the sleeve of her shirt or her garment) through Our Ruh [i.e. Jibrael (Gabriel)], and she testified to the truth of the Words of her Lord [i.e. believed in the Words of Allah: "Be!" and he was; that is 'Iesa (Jesus) - son of Maryam (Mary); as a Messenger of Allah], and (also believed in) His Scriptures, and she was of the Qanitin (i.e. obedient to Allah)."

And to the sister who sent the question and all of the sisters who replied, may Allah reward you for your struggle and bless you.

Salam

Anonymous,  January 12, 2012 at 4:23 AM  

As Salaam o Alaykum sister,

Please note that there are virous degrees of PCOS, I was having difficulty getting pregnant, and i was told that I have PCOS. When i read the information about PCOS i was so worried that i will never be able to get pregnant, but then my doctor said that you have only very little PCOS, a minor one.

If you have periods latter then 4 days please get it treated because the cycle keeps getting bigger and bigger if you dont treat it.

I jused to have periods 2 weeks late and then when eventually they became to be 2 and half and sometimes even 3 months late. If you have irregular periods it means that you are producing less eegs thus your chances of geeting pregant are less. but it doesn't mean that you will get pregnant.

Alhumdulliah, i just took the hormons imbalance (my periods were late due to hormons imbalance) ones and then now i am 4 months pregnant.

So sister one of our test of this life is the test of Trust in Allah (swt). Otherwise if we are to sit here and think about "oh what if i never have children what if i never get married ect ect" it list would be endless, so the thing we should do it simple Trust Allah (swt) He does what is best for us.

Anonymous,  January 12, 2012 at 4:41 AM  

yeah just wanted to add that i also took hormons med 4 years back but from a different doctor and then had tests done from another doctor and then got different tests done at the hospital.


Then i went to this doctor (as i hear my SIL's friend who had same problem as me, got pregnant by seeing this doctor). so she gave me pills to regulate my periods but she said i need to take these pills for 3 month after every cycle, but i just took it ones.

So i the point i want to make is that it is up to Allah (swt) to when to give you and how he wants to give. Our duty is to ask. :)

Anonymous,  January 13, 2013 at 6:20 PM  

Salaam to everyone on here
Been reading alot of these
Jus came across this for the first time on here via google search ( brilliant )
I lost a baby 1 1/2 yrs ago. He lived for almost 2 long beautiful days
I had regulR periods and my pregnancy went calmly with NO problems at all and i conceived quickly
But after i gave birth at 6 months pregnant, i was soon therafter diagnosed Polyscistc ovaries
Problem is MY PERIODS WILL NOT STOP
That means im not conceiving at all right? I hve tried many Islamic medicines (taweez etc) but almost 2 years and still no luck
I did put on 2 stones since my last lregnancy because of stress and emotions runnin wild
However i was 6.5 stones and having lost sum weight over the past few mnths i am now at 8 stone whch still is not drastically overweight
Im very confused
I am in two minds of tkin metformin tabs.... Any advice??

Amy OzarksUSA February 13, 2013 at 12:08 PM  

I have PCOS, too. I've been reading a lot about it lately, and learning a lot about it, too. I've also met a lot of women online who have PCOS, and guess what? A lot of them are mothers! I know in my heart that I will be a Mommy someday, and my gynecologist told me there is no reason PCOS should keep me from having a baby! It was such wonderful news when he said that, I almost cried. I just read a book called "The Savvy Woman's Guide to PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome): The Many Faces of a 21st Century Epidemic....And What You Can Do About It" by Dr. Elizabeth Lee Vliet. I'm determined to get my PCOS under control, and I'm reading "The PCOS Protection Plan: How to Cut Your Increased Risk of Diabetes, Heart Disease, Obesity, and High Blood Pressure" by Colette Harris and Theresa Cheung now. PCOS effects a lot more than just fertility, it can also cause endometrial cancer, diabetes, insulin resistance, high blood pressure, obesity, high cholesterol... But the good news is that we can manage it and get better! Like you said, PCOS is forever, but the symptoms can be managed. That's why I've been reading so much. I'm saving this book for last: "PCOS And Your Fertility" by Colette Harris and Theresa Cheung, because I *know* I can beat this and be a Mommy. My best suggestion is to read about how to manage it and then do it! I hope this helps. Good luck!! :-)

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