RE: Niqabi 101.

Alaikum sisters,

MashAllah, you are niqabis. First of all I want to say that before I used to outright refuse the idea of ever wearing niqab, but recently, as I think about it, I see how wonderful it actually is. I can imagine it being even more comfortable than wearing a hijab, and even more simple, and yes even more liberating. So I am a hijabi and, inshAllah, I would love to wear niqab. And this is where the question comes in:
how do you ladies as niqabis deal with getting an I.D. basically anything that requires an identification, like for the airport especially?
I know it can be done. I just want to know what is the smartest way to deal with these issues. I need some sisterly advice from experienced folks. This way, I will InshAllah do the right thing in these situations, and I don't freak out. And in this way, I can stop all of those "fears" I might have. But I know most of it has to do with me overthinking and having irrational fears. So inshAllah, knowledge will certainly help alleviate in some ways. And, inshAllah, becoming sincere in my intention is definately key in succeeding as with all things ibaadah-related. That's another thing, I need to keep in mind.

thanks a bunch
-niqab 101

wa'alykum as aslam wa rahmutllah wa barkatoo,
Dearest Niqabi 101,
Ma'shaAllah on thinking of joining the club :P Hehe :) Y'know, we hated the niqab ourselves never thought we'd wear it- but SubhanAllah, Allah is the One who has our hearts, isn't He? :) And now it's pretty much a part of us. You probably already did, but just in case you haven't, you can always go through the niqab label we have and see some general advice and all :D
As for your specific question, the honest truth is, when we have to 'show ourselves' like in the airport...we just show ourselves. I'm thinking that's probably not the answer you want to hear. But it is that simple. Alhamdilllah, we're almost always traveling from a Gulf country to Egypt and back- so they're usually quiet understanding (well at least on the Gulf side ;P). I mean, they even have like a private room with a woman officer. On the Egyptian side, it's just a man and you just have to lift the niqab up- real fast- let him take a look- and then you put it back down. That's all. They don't bite :)
If you want more information though for how it is in non-Muslim countries,  we can put this up on the blog and have the other sisters answer you, inshaAllah with their experiences :) Tomorrow? Or later tonight, inshaAllah> :) 
Lots of love,

Wa'alaikumus salam/Salam alaikum,

Not at all. I am not disappointed with the reply. Yes, it would be great to have a discussion on the website especially talking about for non-muslim countries. Also how college student niqaabis do it?

Yep, I checked out the database quesitons on niqaab, although can I still see both of your story of niqaab?


btw, this is the swiftest reply I could have ever expected! Ma'shAllah to you All. Much khair to all three of you. I pray that we can all have even more ikhlaas, and continually be improving in deen.

Salams and love

So yeah..we're turning this over to YOU :)

Show some love and share your stories/ experiences/ advice.

*Sisterly advice* *Best moments while wearing niqab* *Tell us* :D

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He loves me...He loves me not....?

I've recently come back to Islam and I'm very much confused. I've spent the last four years in a relationship with a guy. I've talked to him about making this relationship right and he said he would marry me, but in a year, inshaAllah because we have some problems right now. The problem is that a part of me is not so sure right now that I should marry him because during our time together we had two serious fights when I found out he was talking to another girl behind my back. I was very shocked and he said he would never do it again. But then it happened one more time. I told him then that I was done and that I could not be with a cheater. We parted ways but then he begged for my forgiveness. He told me that he loved me only and that he didn't even know why he was talking to the other girls. He's also introduced me to his family before, so I know that he was serious about me. His family are all very sweet and like me. A part of me desparaetly wants to believe that we are meant to be together, but another part isn't really sure what to do.
Anonymous.

Dear Anonymous,

I know I took foreveeeeeeeeeeer to respond,  but I just didn’t know where to start. This is going to be one jumbled up e-mail. Sorry about that! 

Sweetie, it sounds like you're really confused.  Our feelings can sometimes cloud our judgment and make things seem even more confusing. 


I can't tell you if he is the one for you, but something tells me, that deep down inside, you might already know the answer?

Is he the one for you?

If you were to answer that question- really fast- you know, react to the question, what would you say? I don't want you to justify his behavior. I want you to tell me what you may already know. I mean, the truth is, you've been with him for 4 years! Enough time to get a degree from university. 


 You know him better than I do, better than his family does, and better probably than he knows himself…..

Is he?

If he is, well, you need to keep in mind that dating is haram in Islam.  So, if you believe that he is the one for you, whether or not he has told your parents or his parents about it, you still can’t do anything….no touching hands…no calling him..no talking to him  (without a wali)... ….nothing....until he says those *magical words*: “I do/ I accept”. (Yes, the marriage nikah words.) I know you said that won’t be until a year inshaAllah, but until then, Islamically he is considered a ‘stranger’ to you.

Hey, think of it as 'really giving him a chance to see if he can stay committed to you-- see it a real real fresh start, one based on Allah's blessings, inshaAllah, because there won't be any 
haram!

Think about it. You’re that special! Only someone who is serious about you and serious about starting a future with you –-- only that kind of person- can even daydream about  calling you up in the middle of the night…hanging out with you....holding your hands...

---

On the other hand, if you’re thinking, “I’m really not sure if he is the one for me/ I don’t know why I gave him a second chance…."

I’ll tell you right now…..There's this saying that goes- 

“I won't let someone be my number 1 who makes me his number 2”. 

What do you think you are in his priority list? ( I really am asking....). I mean, of course his and your and all of our 'number 1' should be Allah, the prophet sallah Allahoo alyhee wa saalm, our parents....but after that, where are you?


 I want you to realize that four years isn’t forever. Yes, it’s a long time, but it isn’t forever. Marriage is going to be forever.  If you have one doubt about this relationship, it might be better to just 'stop it'. Why build your future on a risk of whether or not he will stay committed? That is the most basic aspect to a relationship, isn't it? 


I mean, just ask yourself a major question here: can I trust him 100% not to cheat on me again? What if it happens again?  What would happen to me? Will I be able to emotionally deal with that? What if ....what if...he doesn't change? 

Can you trust him? Will you always check his cellphone and his msn chats, etc.?                                                                      
    
You also need to keep in mind that  ‘love’ isn’t the ‘be all and end all’ of everything. 

A young man might claim that he loves a woman but hits her/or beats her. Would it really matter if he  "felt feelings for her" or loved her, then?

The question was never whether this man loved you or not.  It wasn't even whether you 
loved him or not.   The question was whether he would treat you right...whether he would treat you like he loved you.

You see, I hate to break this to you (I really do), but when you accept ‘his excuse’ about ‘loving’ you- you are saying that ‘you will accept any of his behavior as long as he loves you’. GIRL. You are worth more than that. You deserve more than that. The condition shouldn't be about his ‘love’ for you. You are loveable! Who wouldn't love you?! :D It should be about his behavior, because that’s what you’re going to be dealing with day in and day out. He should be 'showing you that he loves you'...not just telling you. 

The truth is this....

Sometimes (and this is what is supposed to happen Islamically)- two people marry each other, not yet completely in love. But these two people treat each other right- in a  courteous, respectful, sweet manner and their loves grows…..until they are in love with each other.

On the other hand, if you guys are crazy in love together, but you don’t treat each other right, that love will fade away….

So the issue isn’t about love. It’s about behavior. There's a big difference. 

In other words- he's supposed to be the guy that you go and cry to. He's not supposed to be 'why' you're crying!

  So sister, I think you need to seriously evaluate this relationship. You need to think about the marriage questions. If you get into a fight, how will he treat you? What does he think a wife is supposed to do? What kind of behavior does he think is accepted/ expected from him? What is a relationship to him? 

You get me?

 What does marriage mean to him? What does it mean to YOU? What kind of a father will he be? 

You need to also ask yourself this very tough question. When you think about keeping your relationship, are you thinking about 'him', or are you thinking about 'who you want him to be'? 

You can't think about 'who you want him to be' because that's not who he is. You have to think about 'him'. Take him as he is right now. Is the one you want 
to marry?

                        
More importantly, I think you really need to ask yourself (and you can ask him but with a wali present) about his 'values'? I mean if you want to have a good future together, that's what you need to know. Forget about the 'sweet memories/your shared history'- at this point in time, do you have a common vision? Do you share the same goal? Do you believe in the same things? You said you've come back to Islam, ma'shaAllah, and that's wonderful to hear.


Has he?
What if you want your daughter to wear hijab and he doesn't? What if he doesn't pray his 5 prayers? What if you don't want music clips in your house and he does? Even if you 'fell in love with' him before, if you don't agree on the role of religion in your life, you guys might drive each other crazy...(Besides, you really should marry someone who does want to be religious). .You really need to address these issues when you meet him with your wali,inshaAllah.  


One thing you can try is praying istikharah, too, inshaAllah. Remember, marriage is half of one's deen. 


Well sister, these are my thoughts on the issue. Hey, I told you it would be jumbled up. inshaAllah the other sisters can help, too :) And maybe you can ask someone more knowledgeable, too, inshaAllah :)

Before I go, though, I want to remind my sisters here that relationships outside of marriage are not permissible and  there is no way that Allah will bless a relationship that goes against His Laws. The door to repentance is open now, though...:)  May Allah guide us :D






Lots of love,


P.S. Animated Icons from: Here :)

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"Don't make me angry, you wouldn't like me when I'm angry!"

Salam alaikum dear aunties,

I love your blog and i took time to read most of the issues that you have discussed but i didnt find any one that relates to my question.
I was born muslim.But i was not really practising islam then.When i turned 16 last december i dont really know how to explain what happened i was just drawn back to islam,everything happened really fast i started doing all the obligatory duties,i now wear hijab and abaya.But the problem i still have is my behaviour.I get really angry and irritated easily.Now brother doesnt respect me again and my family avoid me even though i try to be good but this problem makes all the good things i do for them look bad.please help me.

Wa alaykum salaam dear sister,

You know what? I am really happy that you feel like you've come back to Islam like that, wearing Hijab and everything, subhanAllah, wow, it really does make me smile to hear this. (:

I can understand how you feel that the good part of you isn't significant because you get angry and stuff. But don't lose hope, Islam isn't about being perfect and staying perfect forever. It's about climbing a ladder and continuing to climb. And even when you fall down a rung or two of this ladder, you repent - and continue to climb more, inshaAllah. The fact you've noticed a shortcoming in yourself is a step up the ladder too, so nice one. (:

You've got to understand that someone doesn't acquire an amazing character immediately. Character is formed by habits, which take time to set in your life.

Abû Hurayrah relates that a man said to the Prophet (peace be upon him): “Counsel me.” The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “Do not get angry.” The man repeated his request many times, but the Prophet (peace be upon him) kept saying: “Do not get angry.” [ Sahîh al-Bukhârî ] 

This hadith is so significant because the Prophet (peace be upon him) limited his counselling of this man to this simple command. It obviously states just how incredibly important and beneficial it is to ourselves, our characters, our souls and even others.

Okay, well some things which can help you control your temper:

Understand Anger

Anger is an emotion with a whole lot of energy and this energy inspires action. Once you know this and understand that it's merely a state of mind, you can choose to change this. YOU control your mind, so YOU can control your emotions, thus your anger.

Transfer Anger

A way to channel this energy into something positive is to something, anything which can distract you from it. Painting, drawing, photography, reading - or you mentioned you like to write. You may not feel like you want to do something calming but if you force yourself and make yourself patient through this - it'll work in due time!

Eliminate Anger

These amazing examples from the best human being (peace be upon him), subhanAllah is the answer to the problem I think, (:

1. We should seek refuge with Allah when we become angry. Two men began hurling insults at one another in the presence of the Prophet (peace be upon him), each one insulting the other with such anger that his face had turned red. Th e Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “I know a word that if one were to say it, what stresses him would go away. If he would but say: ‘I seek refuge with Allah from Satan the Accursed'.” [ Sahîh al-Bukhârî and Sahîh Muslim ]

 So to simply say "Audhu billahi minashaytan nirajim", with meaning.

Also:

2. If he is standing, then he should sit. If the anger fails to subside, then he should lie down. [Abu Dawood]

3. A person should remain silent. [Imam Ahmad]

4. Make wudhu. [Abu Dawood]

5. Make ghusl [Abu Nuaim]

Make these things habits and inshaAllah they'll become embedded in your character. SubhanAllah. (:

Another thing; if you feel like you have done something wrong like shout at a family member or say something you shouldn't have or generally slipped in your behaviour, remember to ask for forgiveness from Allah (swt) immediately. Is He (swt) not the Most-Forgiving? 

O 'Ibadi (My slaves) who have transgressed against themselves (by committing evil deeds and sins)! Despair not of the Mercy of Allah, verily Allah forgives all sins. Truly, He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful." (az-Zumar:53)

Truly think about this, sis. Allah will forgive you. Just seek what your soul yearns - seek forgiveness.

But remember, always be the first to say Sorry to whoever you may have upset. Always say sorry. The barrier between a 'sorry' is pride, and I don't think you're a proud person, honey. Just never forget to say sorry. Mean that you're sorry. And even do something to show you're sorry. Pray for the person and pray for yourself too, inshaAllah. :)

A Little Act of Kindness can go a long way if the intention behind it is pure - because pure intentions which hold hands with good deeds - are very powerful indeed. (:

Lastly, make dua! make dua! make dua! I thought I'd say it three times to emphasise its significance. :P But seriously, don't worry because if you make dua for something that will make you closer to Allah - Allah will answer inshaAllah. Just BELIEVE that He (swt) will. And never give up in your dua. Include it in your dua again and again and again. Always! Every dua! Every dua! Every dua! (I did that 'three times' thing again :P)

Lots of love to you honey, (:

And a big hug, 'cause you're sixteen and so am I! :D

You can conquer this. Leap up that ladder - and smile. (:

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Paradise Promised.

Asalamu Aliakum, my lovely sugar sprinkled fudge brownie cupcakes :)

Who is Paradise promised to?

Since our goal should be jannah, I thought it would be a nice idea to ask you guys to post up a hadith/ verse in the Qur'an/ story of a Companion/etc. of someone promised paradise- in the comment section.

That way, InshaAllah we can all learn...

and benefit....

and be inspired....

So that, we too, can be dwellers of Paradise.

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He's my whole World.

Assalamualaikum my dear sisters,
I have a huge problem and I don't know how to get myself out of this situation. I'm engaged with a brother but i keep on thinking about him most of the time. You could say that he is the centre of my life. I listen to a talk about "False attachment" in the youtube and I admit that I have this strong attachment with the brother (he is not even my husband yet :'( ). Alhamdulilah, we never contact each other since we agreed on not having each other's phone number or email address and try our best to observe the boundaries. If we were ever to deliver any news, we have to go through a third person. I'm actually very happy because the brother is a very good muslim. We couldn't get married yet due to some problems. InshAllah Allah knows the best time (Pls make doa for me if there's khayr :D ). The problem is not with him but with me. I'm sad to say that i'm far from the remembrance of Allah swt. When I pray, he is the biggest obstacles for me to concentrate. I know I have a sick heart and I even try to fight it but its hard for me to get out from this cycle. I'm scard if my actions now will affect my life after marriage. Its even sad when i hear this statement from the Quran "Yet there are men who take (for worship) other besides Allah, as equal (with Him). They love them as they should love Allah. But those of Faith are overflowing in their love for Allah (2:165) " Frankly, this brother distract me from the remembrance of Allah swt and i started to become restless. I might not make a strong statement that I love the brother just like i love Allah swt, but it is reflected through my actions and thinking (what occupy my mind the most). I'm afraid to say that the price of getting married is higher than i thought. I want to be close and remember Allah swt.

Wasalam.
Sister Cookie.
(p/s: Sorry if its too long for u to read, may Allah bless u all :D )

Wa'alykum as salam wa rahmatullah wa barkatoo!

Dearest Sister Cookie,

Awww your e-mail made me smile. Congrats on getting engaged! I'm sure it's very natural for a fiancée to think/dream a lot about her future hubby, but it's great ma'shaAllah that you have evaluated how much you think about him and how much you think about Allah. Your e-mail gives me personally a chance to reflect on myself and evaluate if Allah is really first in my life or not, so thank you for that. And girl, that a’int long. I don’t know what you think about our posts, LOL. But seriously, InshaAllah the readers can also evaluate themselves :)

So what can you do?

Well, I think you should start off with just reminding yourself of the facts. When you find your mind wandering, remember how much you really know about him. Are you thinking about something you actually know about him or are you thinking about something you want?

It's like right now, while you’re in this engagement period, he's like a 'ghost'- a shadow of himself.

Okay, that sounds positively eerie.

Let me put it in a different way. Right now, he's like this beautiful country that you've heard about and you dream about visiting.But as many tourists discover, every city has two sides to it. The side we see in commercials and the side the ordinary citizens have to battle with....;)

I’m not saying that he’s some kinda monster. NO WAY.

I’m just reminding you that he is not perfect. (In fact, I honestly think that he's the center of your attention right now because you are not married and you haven't experienced the very normal human side of him, yet. LOL.).

And, as positively cruel as this sounds, (don't hate me!) remind yourself that marrying him will not give you the 'perfect life'. Because the perfect life is not for now. It's in jannah.

See, I don't know if this is a reason why he's become the center of your life or not, but many girls often mistakenly look at their fiancée as the solution to all their problems (maybe the family is a bit strict at home/ parents just don't 'get it'/ whatever) and they imagine that by marrying them they will achieve ever lasting happiness. Unfortunately, that's not the reality of the matter.

Allah says in the Qur'an:

That We created man in toil and trouble. (90:4)

Single or married- we've all got our own problems to deal with, SubhanAllah.

The only One who can guide our hearts and grant us happiness actually is Allah.

Okay, besides reminding yourself of those things, what else can you do?

Make a "Why Do I Love Allah List"



Think about it.

Who is Allah?

He is the Most Loving, the Most Compassionate, the Most Merciful, the One who loves to Blot out Sins, the Forgiver, the One Who Accepts Repentance, the One who Answers the Call of His servants (supplications) …

He is the only One who is Perfect.

He is the One has decreed that His Mercy prevails over his Wrath (related by Muslim and Bukhari.)


He is the One who is more merciful to us than a mother is to her baby (in a hadith related by Umar bin Al Khattab).

I think we often say that but we don't even realize how merciful that is. If we look into the animal kingdom though, we can see amazing amazing examples of mercy . I watched this amazing video once of a female mother bird who puts her life in danger for her babies. "The mother bird who sees an enemy approaching will quietly leave her nest, (actually) place herself in front of the enemy, and start to flutter on the ground, striking it with a wing, making painful cries, and trying to convince the enemy, while staying beyond its reach, that she is helpless (so that it will come to HER!). As the enemy tries to catch her, it gets farther away from the nest (her little babies)." Quoted from here:

In a hadith, it was said: Allah divided mercy in to 100 parts and he kept 99 parts with Himself, and sent down one part on the earth, and because of that one single part,His creation are merciful to each other, so that even the mare lifts up its hoof away from its calf, lest it should trample on it.'(Bukhari)

I mean think about all the mercy around us-- that's just one tiny part!

Think about the mercy of the Prophet- how he forgave the Qurayshi Arabs after all they did to him. Even though they plotted against him. Boycotted him. Abused him. Yet, what did he tell them in the end? "There is no blame upon you."

Now realize that the Prophet sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam's mercy still pales in comparison with the Mercy of the Most Merciful, who chose to begin every surah (except At Tauwbah) with that name.

He is the One who decided how to record the good deeds and the bad deeds in the most merciful and kindest way imaginable. He declared that whoever intended to do good deed but didn’t do it, He would write it down with Himself as a full good deed, and if the person intended to do it and did it, He would write itdown with Himself as from ten good deeds to seven hundred times, or many times over.

Whoever comes [on the Day of Judgement] with a good deed will have ten times the like thereof [to his credit], and whoever comes with an evil deed will not be recompensed except the like thereof; and they will not be wronged. (6: 160)

He showers us with blessings day in and day out. And we sin against Him day in and day out. And yet He stretches His hands out, ready to forgive us.

Allah is our Supporter and Al Hadi, guiding us every step of the way.

He is Al-Mujib- the One who answers the one in need if he asks Him and rescues the yearner if he calls upon Him. He wants us to call on Him.

He Who responds to the oppressed when they call on Him and removes their distress, and has appointed you as inheritors of the land. Is there another deity besides Allah? How little you pay heed! (Surat an-Naml, 62)

He is Near- just a dua away.

And when My servants ask you, [O Muhammad], concerning Me - indeed I am near. I respond to the invocation of the supplicant when he calls upon Me. So let them respond to Me [by obedience] and believe in Me that they may be [rightly] guided.

He remembers us! Imagine you went to a university made up of 1, 000,000 students and you weren't even an amazing student. Just a regular student. And the Chancellor of your university actually would personally call you- remember you- say your name? How great would you feel? Now think about Allah who is the Creator of every single thing...And yet, out of His billions of creations (the people that passed, the people to come, the people now, and all the other creations), if you remember Him, He remembers YOU. 

 I am with him when he makes mention of Me. If he makes mention of Me to himself, I make mention of him to Myself; and if he makes mention of Me in an assembly, I make mention of him in an assemble better than it. And if he draws near to Me an arm's length, I draw near to him a fathom's length. And if he comes to Me walking, I go to him at speed.

He is Ash-Shakur: The One who is Ever Appreciative. He is the One Who appreciates your deeds, however small they are, and doubles the rewards for you in this world and in the hereafter

Narrated Abu Huraira: Allah's Apostle said, "A prostitute was forgiven by Allah, because, passing by a panting dog near a well and seeing that the dog was about to die of thirst, she took off her shoe, and tying it with her head-cover she drew out some water for it. So, Allah forgave her because of that."

He is the One who cares for every single one of his creations and wants his servants to look after each other.

On the authority of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him), who said that the Messenger of Allah (sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam) said: Allah (mighty and sublime be He) will say on the Day of Resurrection:
O son of Adam, I fell ill and you visited Me not. He will say: O Lord, and how should I visit You when You are the Lord of the worlds? He will say: Did you not know that My servant So-and-so had fallen ill and you visited him not? Did you not know that had you visited him you would have found Me with him? O son of Adam, I asked you for food and you fed Me not. He will say: O Lord, and how should I feed You when You are the Lord of the worlds? He will say: Did you not know that My servant So-and-so asked you for food and you fed him not? Did you not know that had you fed him you would surely have found that (the reward for doing so) with Me? O son of Adam, I asked you to give Me to drink and you gave Me not to drink. He will say: O Lord, how should I give You to drink whin You are the Lord of the worlds? He will say: My servant So-and-so asked you to give him to drink and you gave him not to drink. Had you given him to drink you would have surely found that with Me.It was related by Muslim.

He is our Protector: … it is Our duty to help the believers. (Surat ar-Rum, 47)

He is the One who Loves:

On the authority of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him), who said that the Messenger of Allah (sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam) said: Allah (mighty and sublime be He) said:
Whosoever shows enmity to someone devoted to Me, I shall be at war with him. My servant draws not near to Me with anything more loved by Me than the religious duties I have enjoined upon him, and My servant continues to draw near to Me with supererogatory works so that I shall love him. When I love him I am his hearing with which he hears, his seeing with which he sees, his hand with which he strikes and his foot with which he walks. Were he to ask [something] of Me, I would surely give it to him, and were he to ask Me for refuge, I would surely grant him it. I do not hesitate about anything as much as I hesitate about [seizing] the soul of My faithful servant: he hates death and I hate hurting him.

It was related by al-Bukhari.


Did you know that it is said that the Throne of Allah shook for the death of a companion?

Umar narrated that the Messenger of Allah (salallahu alaihi wasalam) said: “This (i.e. Saad ibn Muadh) is the one at whose death the Throne shook, the gates of heaven were opened for him and seventy thousand angels attended his funeral. It squeezed* him once then released him.” [Sunan An-Nasai, Hadeeth No. 2057. Graded 'saheeh' by Shaikh Al-Albani in Saheeh Sunan An-Nasai, Hadeeth No. 2055]

According to the Darussalam commentary, "The Throne shook" means that it shook in the delight of his welcome.]


Don’t you want that, sis?

Can you imagine?

Allah is pleased with them, and they are pleased with Him. (Surat al-Mujadala, 22)

I bet you do....And the thing is.....these are all general reasons. I'm sure if you examine your own life thoroughly, you will find so many more blessings and favors that Allah has given you. You'll find how much He has been there for you :)

So it's time that you occupied  yourself with some more Islamic activities.

- Why not take the opportunity now to learn some more about Allah's Names? What do we mean when we say that He is the Provider? (Who gave you your fiancée)? What is it mean that He is Al Lateef? You can maybe make some kind of goal. "I'm going to learn 20 Names of Allah" before I get married. I highly encourage you to check these videos out…I mean these totally helped me grow in my love for Allah =)

http://journeyafterpurpose.wordpress.com/tag/amr-khaled/
http://journeyafterpurpose.wordpress.com/2008/08/11/amr-khaled-99-names-of-allah-al-kareemever-generous-or-the-noble/

- Dedicate some time to listening to the Qur'an and listening to Islamic lectures

-Make a ‘why am I thankful to Allah’ list =)
-Make a conscious effort to do some more dhikr.

InshaAllah sis, you’ll find yourself putting Allah first. inshaAllah the other sisters can share their advice,

With love,

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Sincerely Yours.

How can you make sure that your actions are sincere? I've been attempting to hide my good deeds to make sure that it's just for the sake Allah (S), but sometimes it doesn't work. How can I keep my intentions of good actions just for the sake of Allah (S) and not this earth?

Thanks so much!
Jazaks!
Anonymous

Wa'alykum as salam wa rahamutullah wa barkatoo!

Dear Sister Anonymous,
You've asked a great question ma'shaAllah and a question that plagues me almost daily. Really. So, I'm going to try and give you some ideas and hope that the readers will give more, inshaAllah :)

How can we make our actions sincere?

Well, you definitely hit right on the nail when you said that you try and hide your deeds. That's key. The trick is to do things when and where no one will/can see you...

So for example,

• you can try staying up in your room and reading Qu'ran after fajr, 
• waking up in the middle of the night and praying qiyam al layl, 
• fasting on a random day and actually 'pretending' to make a lunch box (so that your family actually think you're not fasting) and sitting down with them during dinner, 
• donating anonymously to a charity box, 
• even wearing your hijab to some deserted area where no one would see you anyway... .
• If you're in university, and you've got some fantastic idea/suggestion for the MSA, turn it in anonymously. 
• If you give halaqahs/write/etc. try to end with the reminder that what good you say is from Allah and the mistakes are actually from you and the Shaitan.

But yes, sometimes, you just can't hide your deeds/ hide that it is you behind the deed.

What to do?

- Put up this reminder somewhere where you are bound to see it:

"And so it was said".

You know who will say that and when they will say that? Allah Subhanoo Wa' Tala on the Day of Judgment.

On the authority of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him), who said: I heard the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) say:

The first of people against whom judgment will be pronounced on the Day of Resurrection will be a man who died a martyr. He will be brought and Allah will make known to him His favours and he will recognize them. [ The Almighty] will say: And what did you do about them? He will say: I fought for you until I died a martyr. He will say: You have lied - you did but fight that it might be said [of you]: He is courageous. And so it was said. Then he will be ordered to be dragged along on his face until he is cast into Hell-fire.

 [Another] will be a man who has studied [religious] knowledge and has taught it and who used to recite the Quran. He will be brought and Allah will make known to his His favours and he will recognize them. [The Almighty] will say: And what did you do about them? He will say: I studied [religious] knowledge and I taught it and I recited the Quran for Your sake. He will say: You have lied - you did but study [religious] knowledge that it might be said [of you]: He is learned. And you recited the Quran that it might be said [of you]: He is a reciter. And so it was said. Then he will be ordered to be dragged along on his face until he is cast into Hell-fire.

[Another] will be a man whom Allah had made rich and to whom He had given all kinds of wealth. He will be brought and Allah will make known to his His favours and he will recognize them. [The Almighty] will say: And what did you do about them? He will say: I left no path [untrodden] in which You like money to be spent without spending in it for Your sake. He will say: You have lied - you did but do so that it might be said [of you]: He is open-handed. And so it was said. Then he will be ordered to be dragged along on his face until he is cast into Hell-fire.
It was related by Muslim (also by at-Tirmidhi and an-Nasa'i).

Just reading that hadith every day should remind you inshaAllah that whatever your reason is for doing the good deed...you're going to get it. If you want the dunya, you'll get the dunya....but as this hadith shows, at the expense of the hereafter.

Related to this, remind yourself that Allah subhanoo Wa’ Tala is the All Knower.

He knows that which deceives the eyes and what the breasts conceal. (40:19)

- Another thing to do is to question your intentions regularly. At the end of each week, ask your heart about its intention. It would be even better if you did it each night before you went to sleep. Ask yourself- "why am I doing this?"

If you're not exactly sure what your intention is, check your nasiha thermometer.

What do I mean by that?

Well the nasiha thermometer is my made up term for how well you accept nasiha. If you find that you're unwilling to accept someone's sound Islamic advice regarding your deed, maybe you don't have the most sincere intentions out there. Think about it. Sincerity implies that you only want to do it for Allah's sake- we really shouldn't have pride when it comes to doing something for Allah's sake. We should be willing to improve and seek any means to draw closer to Him/better our good acts. Ask yourself- if this is for Allah’s sake, why am I not willing to improve/ accept this person’s advice?

-Realize that your actions were never going to get you heaven anyways but your intentions behind your deeds.
Remember that hadith we’ve put up here a lot? The one about the man who killed 99 people? Well, at the end of one of the versions of this hadith, it stated that Allah moved the earth for this man. When we examine this hadith though, we don’t really see that the man actually did any ‘good deeds’. What was it then that earned him paradise? His sincerity- his sincerity to return to Allah, to become a good person, to live his life in a way that pleases Allah.

In fact, we can see this same concept- that it is not our deeds but our intention/sincerity behind them that leads to jannah- when we look at this hadith:

It was narrated from Sahl ibn Hunayf (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Whoever sincerely asks Allaah for martyrdom, Allaah will cause him to attain the status of the martyrs, even if he dies in his bed.” Narrated by Muslim, 1909.

- Make Dua. Ask Allah to help you keep your intentions for Him.

- Okay, I'm going to guess since you turned this question in, you kinda already know all this, but you can’t help wanting ‘the dunya’…
Like maybe you go to the mosque only because you want to get married and you think you’ll find someone there…or you’re working really hard at university only because you’re worried about getting a job/ want to get a super amazing career and not really for Allah’s sake …What do you do?

You turn to Allah. It’s alright to ask Allah to give you the best of this dunya and the aakhirah. Remember, Allah says:

But among them is he who says, "Our Lord, give us in this world [that which is] good and in the Hereafter [that which is] good and protect us from the punishment of the Fire." (Surat Al Baqarah: 201).
Remember, the Prophet sallah Allahoo alyhee wa salam said that if you are to ask- ask of Allah. In surat Al Fatiha we say, It is You we worship and You we ask for help. (5)” .

Rather than directing all your efforts and good deeds in the hopes that you’ll get ‘the stuff on this earth’, just ask Allah to make things easy for you in this world and give you the best. Tell Allah that you know you have NO other Lord but Him, and that no one could give you whatever it is that you want but Him.

 Not your work. Not your good grades. Not your amazing connections/ wealth/etc. If He didn’t will it, you wouldn’t get it. Period.

Come to think of it, the daily morning/evening adkhaar have many references to the 'good of this day/night'- try saying them :) In this way, instead of you focusing on the dunya, you'll know that Allah is taking care of it for you :)

 Just turn your worries and desires into a heart wrenching dua to the One and Only Lord you have =)

Well, sis, these are my small ideas. I hope inshaAllah the readers will provide us with more =D

Verily it is Allah who is The Provider, Bestower, the Guardian and Protector. 

(Images from: http://easelandink.forumotion.com/t1260-allah-s-beautiful-names)

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Draw Prophet Mohammed Day.

What is your response going to be for Draw Prophet Muhammed day?

Asalamu aliakuam!

Good question. I completely forgot about that. I don't think there's too much hype about it this year but my response will be the same response as last year.

Allow me to draw you a picture of him.....by putting up his quotes.

(These animations were created by Little Miss Aunty and I. Please feel more than free to pass them around.)

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